


LooNEY_DAC's SSSS Filks

by LooNEY_DAC



Category: Stand Still Stay Silent
Genre: Filk Collection
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-21
Updated: 2018-06-29
Packaged: 2018-11-03 01:56:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 101
Words: 25,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LooNEY_DAC/pseuds/LooNEY_DAC
Summary: Most of these were originally posted in theSilent World Recording Studios!thread of the SSSS Fan Forum, where many other good filkers have placed good filks of their own.





	1. List of filks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Links will be added as future filks are posted. There's a _lot_ already.

=1=  
[The Ballad of Pp. 240-249](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24389181)  
=2=  
[We Are the Cleansers](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24389319)  
=3=  
[“Splurking”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24389703)  
=4=  
[“Down the Hall”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24389802)  
=5=  
[Where in the World is Lalli Hotakainen?](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24390006)  
=6=  
[“Ashes Again”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24390102)  
=7=  
[“Burning Pages”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24390453)  
=8=  
[“Ceilin’ Crawlin’ People Eater”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24390705)  
=9=  
[“The Cat-Tank Went Down to Kastrup”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24390834)  
=10=  
[“On the Fly”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24390993)  
=11=  
[“Kastrup”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24391080)  
=12-13=  
[“The Grossling & the Cat-Tank’s Crew”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24391563)  
Part I  
+  
Part II  
=14=  
[“Mora”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24391842)  
=15-20=  
[The “Mary Poppins” Prologue Suite](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24397047)  
+  
Norway -- “Keep Granny Safe”  
+  
Denmark -- “I Hate My Job”  
+  
Finland -- “The Loons Migrate”  
+  
Sweden -- “A Lonely Trip”  
+  
Iceland -- “Hold the Line”  
+  
Year 90 -- “Life Goes on”  
=21=  
[“It’s a Simple Little Mission”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24397182)  
=22=  
[“The Rash Is My Master”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24397341)  
=23=  
[“This Gorgeous Moment”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24397416)  
=24-26=  
[The Simon & Garfunkel Chapter 1 Suite](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24397560)  
+  
“Lalli Goes to Mora”  
+  
“Exploring”  
+  
“Sparkély Hair”  
=27=  
[“Braidy’s World”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24397689)  
=28=  
[The Cleanser Anthem](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24397776)  
=29=  
[“Waiting for Braidy (Meta)”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24397878)  
=30=  
[“Pressin’ the F5”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24397962)  
=31=  
[“Cleanser Recruiting Song”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24404538)  
=32=  
[“The Black Noise”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24404748)  
=33-37=  
[The “Oliver!” Chapter Two Suite](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24405117)  
+  
“Entering Mora”  
+  
“Present Blessings”  
+  
“Past Reflections”  
+  
“Words Kind and Unkind”  
+  
“Future Plans/And We’re Off!”  
=38=  
[“The Saga of Braidy’s Hair”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24405327)  
=39=  
[“Moon, Shine Your Light Down”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24405549)  
=40=  
[“Lalli-by”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24405732)  
=41=  
[“Beyond the Scene”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24405924)  
=42=  
[“Captain Ása”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24406143)  
=43=  
[“PAIN!!!!!”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24406260)  
=44=  
[“The Sound of Squeeing”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24407847)  
=45=  
[“Reynir the Red-Haired Goofball”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24408006)  
=46=  
[“The (Other) Voting Song”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24408105)  
=47=  
[“The Wanderer’s Song”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24408183)  
=48=  
[“Old Bornholm”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24408435)  
=49=  
[“A Mother’s Lament”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24408504)  
=50=  
[“A Wand’ring Shepherd”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24408660)  
=51=  
[“Silent World”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24408780)  
=52=  
[“Here’s Reynir the Braid”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24408810)  
=53=  
[“A Shipper’s Meme”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24409014)  
=54=  
[“Ode to a Chapter Cover”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24409146)  
=55=  
[“Lalli With the Moon in His Hands”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24409200)  
=56=  
[“Dream Runner”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24409278)  
=57=  
[“Alive in Kastrup”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24409458)  
=58=  
["Let Them Squee"](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24409542)  
=59=  
[“A Tuuri Lament”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24410025)  
=60=  
[“Cat-Boy”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24410103)  
=61=  
[“Keep Your Mask On, Reynir”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24461562)  
=62=  
[“One Last F5”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24461604)  
=63=  
[“Poor Doc Mikkel”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24461655)  
=64=  
[“Sparkle Once Again”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24461703)  
=65=  
["The Building Is Blown"](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24461787)  
=66=  
[“There is a Fawn in Danish Kastrup”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24461844)  
=67=  
[“Deer Encounter”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24462198)  
=68=  
[“Classroom Deer”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24462336)  
=69=  
[“Reynir Meets the Skulldog”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24462378)  
=70=  
[“Dreamland Reynir”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24464430)  
=71=  
[“Cookie Trebuchets”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24464475)  
=72=  
[“Only it’s Onni”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24464532)  
=73=  
[“Reynir’s Song”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24464676)  
=74=  
[“I Helped!”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24464721)  
=75=  
[“Here in My Haven”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24464775)  
=76=  
[“Finnish Mage”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24464817)  
=77=  
[“The Coming of DerpKitty”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24464910)  
=78=  
[“Emil, the Swedish Cleanser”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24465030)  
=79=  
[“The Emil on the Prowl”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24465063)  
=80=  
[“Minna’s Minnions”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24465108)  
=81=  
[“Draw”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24465276)  
=82=  
[“Kill the Beast”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24465369)  
=83=  
[“Cry of Cthulhund”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24465444)  
=84=  
[“Journey’s End/Stand Still. Stay Silent”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24465486)  
=85=  
[“The Death of MomCat”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24465540)  
=86=  
[“Lonely Lalli”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24465576)  
=87=  
[The Little Filker](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24465609)  
=88=  
[“That Porridge Smells Good”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24465675)  
=89=  
[“(Loot) Copenhagen”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24465720)  
=90=  
["Driving Through the Wreck of Olden Days"](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24465927)  
=91=  
[“Through the Ruined City”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24465960)  
=92=  
[“Invoking Luonto”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24465987)  
=93=  
[“What Next?”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24466032)  
=94=  
[“Warm Jacket Mine”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24466065)  
=95=  
[“Tuuri’s Song (Through the Silent World)”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24466128)  
=96=  
[“The Note”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24466197)  
=97=  
[“Dream Dog”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24466251)  
=98=  
[“Dream Reynir”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24466299)  
=99=  
["Reynir's Dream"](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24466332)  
=100-104=  
[The “Muppet Movie” Chapter 4 Suite](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24466623)  
+  
“The Team Complete”  
+  
“Loading Up the Cat-Tank”  
+  
“How Sigrun Joined the Team”  
+  
“Lalli in the Dreamworld”  
+  
“Into the Silent World”  
=105=  
[“Onni’s Lament”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24466704)  
=106=  
[“Water Troll”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24466749)  
=107=  
[“Cruel Murder-Ghosts”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24466794)  
=108=  
[“Soulless Flat Plain”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24466905)  
=109=  
[“(Murder-) Ghosts on the Prowl”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24467001)  
=110=  
[“Ghosts in Their Hosts”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24467046)  
=111=  
[“Odense Daze”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24467085)  
=112=  
[“Sigh”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24467112)  
=113=  
[“No Regret I Find”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24467142)  
=114=  
[“Silent World Foray”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/24702795)  
=115=  
[“I Was in His Mind”](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/28334829)  
=116=  
[“Velje Lullaby”](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10957275/chapters/35008073)  


Thought I was kidding when I said there's a _lot_ , didn't you?


	2. The Ballad of Pp. 240-249

=1=  
The Ballad of Pp. 240-249  
from [“Ooh-De-Lally”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ckqIsL4d550)  
by Roger Miller

Lalli, Emil, Sigrun  
Searching through the building  
Looking for the   
Books they’re here to   
Try to haul away  
Found a book they  
Take a look and  
Promptly it disintegrates

Look at Lalli  
Look at Lalli  
Frowning in dismay

Emil broke it  
Sigrun choked out  
But it wasn’t all his fault  
It was moldering and rotted away

So they went on  
Then they found the  
Clinic and its bodies  
And Sigrun slapped the freaked-out Emil  
In the Face

Lalli, Emil, Sigrun  
Standing ’midst the bodies  
Sigrun telling  
Emil, “They’re the   
Order of the day  
Not to worry  
Until Lalli freaks  
(And is he? I dunno)”

Look at Lalli  
Tired Lalli  
“Tired is okay”

Lalli, Emil, Sigrun  
Climbing up the stairs now  
Sigrun stops and  
Points up with a  
Smile as bright as day  
Once they pass the  
Glass they’ll be in  
Someone’s private library

Look at Lalli  
Happy Lalli  
Finally knows the way

Tuuri squees when  
She sees Mikkel  
Piling up that first load  
“Can I see them?” she excitedly begs

“Not until the  
Protocol says,”  
Mikkel tells her casually  
And Tuuri gripes a bit but  
Says, “Okay”

Lalli, Emil, Sigrun  
Sorting through the bookshelves  
Trying to pick which  
Books to take and  
Which have gotta stay  
Lalli’s leaned back  
In a chair to  
Try to get some shut-eye

Look at Lalli  
Sleepy Lalli  
Time to hit the hay

Lalli, Emil, Sigrun  
Stacking up the books high  
Emil thinks that  
Mikkel would be  
Helpful as a dray  
Then he sees how  
Lalli’s looking  
Freaking at the vent now

Look at Lalli  
Worried Lalli  
Time to run away

Look at Lalli  
Worried Lalli  
Time to run away


	3. We Are the Cleansers

=2=  
Pg 254  
We Are the Cleansers  
from [“We Are the Champions”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=04854XqcfCY)  
by Queen

Kill them with fire  
Burn out the nests  
Then let the winter  
Take care of the rest

Send in the cats  
And mop-up crews  
Put up the walls and  
Burn out what’s left  
So nothing gets through

And the cycle goes   
On and on and   
On and on and

We are the Cleansers of the land  
And nothing that fights us will stand  
We are the Cleansers  
We are the Cleansers  
No Troll can beat us cause  
We are the Cleansers  
Of the land


	4. Splurking

=3=  
Pg 259  
“Splurking”  
from [“Crawling”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gd9OhYroLN0)  
by Linkin Park

Now something in me wants  
To run away with all speed  
Pure instinct  
I can’t think  
It’s just a little troll  
I know I have to kill it  
My duty  
It haunts me

Abandoned by my friend  
I’m all alone again  
(Arrogance unlike confidence is my best defense against all those laughing at me)  
I take one step, no more  
And down it pours!

Splurking in my hair  
So sticky do I feel  
Whoa, is that a jaw?  
It stings but I won’t squeal


	5. Down the Hall

=4=  
Pg 258  
“Down the Hall”  
from [“By the Way”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JnfyjwChuNU)  
by the Red Hot Chili Peppers

Walking the halls  
To find a troll in here  
What is it I hear?  
Scritch scritch scratch

Down the hall it  
Seems so small I’ll  
Kill it  
Hack and slash

On my way back  
To grab a big book stack  
But where is Lalli?  
Scritch scritch scratch

Down the hall it  
Seems so small I’ll  
Kill it  
Hack and slash

Grosslings  
Money  
Hack job  
Dumb Swede

Ok now  
I’ve gotta take out this guy  
Only then  
Can I meet Lalli’s big eyes  
Sigrun too  
Might think some better of me  
Maybe Mikkel  
Won’t try to go and prank me

Cancer  
Bandage  
Hair spray  
Pancakes

Walking the halls  
To find a troll in here  
And it sounds so clear  
Scritch scritch scratch

Down the hall it  
Seems so small I’ll  
Kill it  
Hack and slash


	6. Where in the World is Lalli Hotakainen?

=5=  
Pg 263  
Where in the World is Lalli Hotakainen?  
from [“Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s1EIUP8tvbE)  
by Rockapella

He was dragged off  
On this trip  
By his little cousin Tuuri  
He was up all last night scouting  
With his eyes all glowing (Neat!)  
Now he sneaked off  
Somewhere upstairs  
And since then nobody's seen him  
Tell me  
Where in the world is  
Lalli Hotakainen?

Well from Finland  
To Norway  
He'll fight grosslings  
His way  
Though they go  
From Malmo  
To Svalbard  
And back


	7. Ashes Again

=6=  
Pg 263  
“Ashes Again”  
from [“Dust in the Wind”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tH2w6Oxx0kQ)  
by Kansas

Burn it down  
All my world engulfed in flames  
That comfort me  
Fires burn out  
And the wind stirs up what’s left  
So I can see

Ashes again  
All I have are  
Ashes again

Tend the nest  
Trying to hold on to what  
Is left of me  
The Cleansers’ fire  
Turns all of my hard work into  
Futility

Ashes again  
All I have are  
Ashes again

Sparks remain  
Sheltered in the cinders but  
They soon go cold  
The colors fade  
Only grays where once were  
Reds, blues and gold

Ashes again  
All I have are  
Ashes again

Ashes again  
Everything now  
Ashes again


	8. Burning Pages

=7=  
Pg 264  
“Burning Pages”  
from [“Burning Bridges”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qXIjE_gDw94)  
by the Mike Curb Congregation

Sigrun said no shooting  
So I cut them with my knife  
But they still attacked me  
And I fought them for my life  
They all tried to kill me  
And what’s worse  
They gooped my hair  
Now I’ll turn and   
Burn down this whole lair

All the burning pages  
That are floating  
After me

All that lovely money  
But it wasn’t  
Meant to be

Every tome we left behind  
Just makes the burning grow  
Burning pages  
Now it’s time to go

Lalli went and left me  
In the hall a while ago  
Maybe this will help him  
These lighters that I throw  
I just hope he joins us  
From what place  
He may have gone  
All I know is  
It’s time to move on

All the burning pages  
That are floating  
After me

All that lovely money  
But it wasn’t  
Meant to be

Every tome we left behind  
Just makes the burning grow  
Burning pages  
Now it’s time to go

Fear is past and I can  
See the grossling bearing down  
Toss the starters at it and  
Say, “Try to eat this, clown!”  
As they go off all at  
Once the shock  
Knocks me away  
Well I had no  
Reason left to stay

All the burning pages  
That are floating  
After me

All that lovely money  
But it wasn’t  
Meant to be

Every tome we left behind  
Just makes the burning grow  
Burning pages  
Now it’s time to go


	9. Ceilin’ Crawlin’ People Eater

=8=  
Pg 264  
“Ceilin’ Crawlin’ People Eater”  
from [“Purple People Eater”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CPL503kUo3Y)  
by Sheb Wooley

Well I heard the thing  
Scritchin’ down the hall  
Usin’ one of its claws  
To scritch across the wall  
A jaw fell on me  
And I looked up to see  
A troll crawlin’ on the ceilin’  
Just above me

It was a  
Slack-jawed  
Big-mawed  
Ceilin’ Crawlin’ People Eater  
Slack-jawed  
Big-mawed  
Ceilin’ Crawlin’ People Eater  
Slack-jawed  
Big-mawed  
Ceilin’ Crawlin’ People Eater  
What a sight to see!

So I dodged its fall  
As it fell down low  
And I hit it with my lantern  
And it screeched like so  
I lit out runnin’  
Thought I was home free  
When another people eater  
Jumped out at me!

It was a  
Six-armed  
Thick-tailed  
Spider-Lizard People Eater  
Six-armed  
Thick-tailed  
Spider-Lizard People Eater  
Six-armed  
Thick-tailed  
Spider-Lizard People Eater  
Jumpin’ out at me!

Well, I cut off its arms  
But it didn’t slow down  
So I knifed it in the neck  
As it knocked me down  
I called out, “Sigrun  
Will you please help me?”  
And Sigrun chopped its head off  
Just as clean as could be

She killed the  
Six-armed  
Thick-tailed  
Spider-Lizard People Eater  
Six-armed  
Thick-tailed  
Spider-Lizard People Eater  
Six-armed  
Thick-tailed  
Spider-Lizard People Eater  
Tryin’ to eat me

Well, she told me to run  
And she turned to go  
But I told her to wait  
And I grabbed what I’d stowed  
Popped the cap on the flask  
And started pourin’ it out  
And ran to follow Sigrun  
From the thing with the mouth

Away from  
Slack-jawed  
Big-mawed  
Ceilin’ Crawlin’ People Eaters  
Slack-jawed  
Big-mawed  
Ceilin’ Crawlin’ People Eaters  
Slack-jawed  
Big-mawed  
Ceilin’ Crawlin’ People Eaters  
What a sight to see!

When we got far enough  
I grabbed my bandoleer  
I pulled the four igniters  
And I threw them clear  
The great big People Eater   
Chasin’ after us  
Got caught in an explosion  
That blew it to dust!

Good bye to  
Slack-jawed  
Big-mawed  
Ceilin’ Crawlin’ People Eaters  
Slack-jawed  
Big-mawed  
Ceilin’ Crawlin’ People Eaters  
Slack-jawed  
Big-mawed  
Ceilin’ Crawlin’ People Eaters  
Now you can’t eat me!


	10. The Cat-Tank Went Down to Kastrup

=9=  
Pg 265  
For @slim kittens

“The Cat-Tank Went Down to Kastrup”  
from [“The Devil Went Down to Georgia”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K6RUg-NkjY4)  
by the Charlie Daniels Band

The Cat-Tank went down to Kastrup  
They were lookin’ for some books to loot  
So they sent a scout  
To try to suss ‘em out  
And the grosslings wouldn’t give a hoot

The Captain picked their target  
Once the scout was safely back  
They lit out  
And Mikkel big and stout  
Popped the door for ’em with a crack

And there wouldn’t you know it  
Was a cold and dark Death Room  
Got Emil scared  
But Sigrun shared,  
“It’s just a big ol’ tomb”

They pressed on down the hallway and  
They found books in a room  
Emil & Sigrun took  
Each a stack of books  
But Lalli only one volume

Tuuri asked, “Can I see?”  
But mighty Mikkel shook his head  
“Go by the protocol  
Or not at all  
Less’en you want to be dead.”

Lalli curled up to take a nap  
When they came back for more  
And Emil wanted Mikkel  
So it wouldn’t be a chore

But then ol’ Lalli  
Heard the little  
Skitter from the hole  
And Emil said to Sigrun,  
“There’s a troll!”

The Captain looked at Emil and  
She said, “Let’s KILL IT DEAD,  
But use your knife  
To take its life  
So there’s no others up ahead.”

And she sprinted to the Death Room  
And Lalli sneaked off on his own  
And Emil cussed him out  
With a muffled shout  
Cause now he was all alone

So after fifteen minutes Emil  
Heard a little scratch  
But when his hair got slimed  
His eyeline climbed  
To spot the troll ready to snatch

Emil  
Hit it with the lantern  
In the face  
Then he tried to run  
Out of this place  
Spider-Lizard jumped him  
From the side  
Emil fought it off and  
For Sigrun cried

 

Sigrun took the grossling’s head  
And got Emil to his feet  
She told him, “Run!”  
But Emil’s fun  
Was not nearly complete

Emil poured his flask out  
And he grabbed his four grenades  
He threw them true  
And then they blew  
Like a great big cannonade

The boom  
Broke out every window  
On the block  
Mikkel turned, his face  
Just full of shock  
“Tuuri, get her started!  
It’s time to go!  
Sigrun, Emil--Hey  
Where’s Lalli though?”


	11. On the Fly

=10=  
Pg 173  
“On the Fly”  
from [“Still Alive”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6ljFaKRTrI)  
by Jonathan Coulton

It was a giant  
That Lalli took note of  
On the train  
The Dalahasten crew  
Leapt into action

Emil grabbed Lalli  
To do what he could to  
Save his friend  
Tried to keep him  
Safe from harm  
The giant’s finger advanced

But the tunnel freed them  
Chopping the finger free  
And Miss Hearty Undead  
Said to Emil, “Help me!”  
And he screamed like a girl  
Popped Mis Hearty’s frail skull  
With a punch he let loose  
On the fly

It started so simply  
They were in Mora, “Rainy Town”  
Torbjorn Siv and Taru all  
Went with them

And Lalli was stubborn  
And prayed to the Goddess  
Kuutar first  
As the moon shone  
Down on us  
They were so happy, our crew

“With the Moon our risk has  
Dropped to seven tonight  
So to all our riders we  
Shall bid a good night  
Don’t forget your bed belts  
Or you may be getting welts  
As the grosslings attack  
On the fly”

Even the trainsaws  
Just couldn’t keep out the  
Giant’s hand  
Breaking through the  
Armored steel  
To kill them

But then the tunnel  
Ripped off the giant  
From the train  
Leaving only minor wounds  
And one compound fractured arm

And the train kept going  
Through the night and the storm  
And Agneta told them  
All, “This isn’t the norm!”  
And poor Tuuri missed the “fun”  
But the Vasterstroms were done  
From the giant that struck  
On the fly

And they took out the heads  
On the fly  
They fought the giant and won  
On the fly  
They did fantastic and all  
On the fly  
All thanks to Lalli’s warning  
On the fly  
And they got through it all right  
On the fly

On the fly  
On the fly


	12. Kastrup

=11=  
Pg 269

“Kastrup”  
from [“El Paso”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=spaPETdoRVM)  
by Marty Robbins

Out in the old Danish  
Suburb of Kastrup  
There roved a Cat-Tank  
With looters all filled  
Daytime would find them  
Exploring the buildings  
Trying to find books  
But not to be killed

Black were the nights when they  
Sent Lalli scouting  
Running so fleet he  
Would never be caught  
Emil was worried  
For his skinny Finn friend  
Tuuri regretful  
But Sigrun was not

Day one a wild foray the three made  
Dreaming of all they’d be paid  
But in the building  
Some trolls there were lairing  
The library acted  
As excellent bait

So when Emil was  
Stalked by a troll as it  
Hung from the ceiling  
Lured on by scratching  
Sounds from further on  
Emil struck out and struck  
True with his lantern  
The troll cried out loud and  
Away Emil ran

Another troll jumped out  
Six-legged and huge-mouthed  
The front pair fell prey  
To Emil’s swift blade  
But it kept coming  
Though Emil stabbed its neck  
His only chance was  
For help from Sigrun

And Sigrun decapitated the troll  
Pulled Emil up from the floor  
Sigrun was running  
But Emil had one thing  
Set in his mind  
For the fate of the troll

Emptied his hip flask  
Emil grabbed four “lights” and  
Truly he threw them  
They filled the hall with  
Bright fiery death

Anything left in that  
Building was worthless  
Flames would consume it  
‘Til nothing was left  
Only one load made  
It out to the Cat-Tank  
And Lalli got out  
But just by a breath

As Mikkel gaping said, “Tuuri, let’s go!”  
Sigrun brought Emil outside  
Lalli jumped out from  
A window above them  
His fall stopping Emil from  
Rushing back in

Mikkel caught Lalli  
Who jumped from his arms and  
Gave Emil a glare  
“You were the one who  
Ditched me,” Emil said  
They all piled into  
The Cat-Tank as it left  
Tuuri drove solo  
So they could clean off

Emil was coming down  
Hard from the action  
When Sigrun grabbed him  
By both of his cheeks  
“That was the AWESOMEST!”  
Sigrun yelled at him  
“We’ll loot this whole town  
And burn out what’s left!”

“Are you with me, Viking Emil?” she said  
And Emil smiled weakly and hurled  
Mikkel took Sigrun  
Put her in the corner  
While Lalli looked like  
He wanted to hide

They moved on to  
Old Kastrup Fort where they  
Washed off their clothing  
Mikkel and Sigrun  
Sat chewing the fat  
“Do tell me, Sigrun  
Did you sort what you found?”  
“A book is a book  
They’re all of great worth.”

“I guessed as much from the  
Titles you brought me.”  
“Why waste our time when  
There’s danger about?”  
“It might have been worth the  
Trouble,” quoth Mikkel  
“Who in their right mind  
Wants a book on Golf?”


	13. The Grossling & the Cat-Tank’s Crew

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Before you say it, I know her name isn't pronounced that way. This filk is being posted here warts and all, regardless.

=12=  
Pg 269  
“The Grossling & the Cat-Tank’s Crew”  
from [“The Walrus & the Carpenter”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=00WCEbKM_SE)  
by Sammy Fain  
Part I

The grossling rested patiently  
Waiting for its prey  
It nested in a building fair  
Far from the light of day  
And so it went across the years  
It knew no other way

The Cat-Tank rambled merrily  
Its crew more than content  
An errand of great import was  
The reason they’d been sent  
To find the Elder Knowledge lost  
On Silent Continent

The Captain a great fighter was  
The Medic big and strong  
The Cleanser a huge firebug  
Who often got things wrong  
Their Scout a cat in human form  
And Tuuri tagged along

Her job was the important one  
So I’ll describe it here  
She translated and organized  
And made everything clear  
The mission skald she was, but not  
Immune to Rash, I fear

They drove along the Kastrup streets  
Until they reached their goal  
A building with a library  
Which they could plunder whole  
But whether tomes in it were sound  
Was quite past their control

The grossling looked out on the street  
As they went driving by  
And only Emil thought to meet  
Its single dangling eye  
“WeLL hOw pOLiTe oF HiM,” it thought  
“He’S sUCh a NiCe yOUng GuY.”

It kept a weather eye on them  
As they pulled up at last  
The building looked small from outside  
But inside it was vast  
A monument to all the ones  
Who lived there in years past

Already Emil’s nerves did twitch  
As they approached the door  
When Sigrun laid her rules out he  
Just nodded, nothing more  
Her recon hadn’t found a nest  
So they would probe this floor

When Emil’s light picked up a book  
He grabbed it with a cheer  
But then it crumbled into dust  
Confirming his worst fears  
“Our mission’s lost,” he cried out then,  
“There’s nothing for us here!”

TO BE CONTINUED...

=13=  
Pg 270  
“The Grossling & the Cat-Tank’s Crew”  
Part II

As Emil cried out in despair  
Unmoved was our Sigrun  
She told him, “Don’t be silly, man!  
We’ve scarcely just begun!  
There’s treasures vast out there to find,  
So come along, young one!”

They found a hidden library  
After the big Death Room  
Now Emil wanted nothing more  
Than to escape the gloom  
“I really don’t like this,” quoth he  
“It’s too much like a tomb!”

They quickly fetched a single load  
And brought it to Mikkel  
And Emil thought the big Dane should  
Help with the next as well  
But Lalli sensed a grossling spy  
“It’s in the vents? Do tell!”

As Mikkel kept his weary watch  
The grossling spied on him  
And Tuuri in the Cat-Tank stayed  
Her hopes once high now dim  
Two very tasty morsels these  
But not at risk of limb

The others had split up inside  
Despite Emil’s protest  
His instincts jangled but he thought  
The Captain knows what’s best  
When Sigrun looked in the Death Hall  
She quickly found a nest

“The noob was right,” she knew at once  
And slipped back through the maze  
But Emil all alone faced two  
The Six-Legs and Toothface  
She took the head of one and he  
Went back to Cleansers’ ways

A great explosion rocked the street  
The grossling shrieked in fear  
And Mikkel called out to Tuuri  
The time to go was near  
He then asked Emil and Sigrun  
“Why isn’t Lalli here?”

When Emil shouted for Lalli  
And tried to go back in  
The cat-boy through a window leapt  
Wherever had he been?  
He landed in the Dane’s broad grasp  
And glared at Emil then

The grossling watched the Cat-Tank go  
So things were looking up  
The house across was all in flames  
Thanks to that Emil pup  
It thought, ‘I’d rATheR MiSs A mEaL  
ThaN HaVe iT BurN mE uP!’


	14. Mora

=14=  
Pg 127  
“Mora”  
from [“Mary”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9JdQDff4QcE)  
by G.M. Cohan

They went to  
Mora  
Mora  
Because it was  
On the way

But they took  
Emil’s kit  
Yes all of it  
What could  
He say?

For it was  
Mora  
Mora  
Capital of  
Sweden’s land

A loyal  
Swede was he  
A Cleanser, see?  
But his kit  
Was  
Banned

And so in  
Mora  
Mora  
Emil fixed up  
Lalli’s hair

And they walked  
As it’s free  
“Bye, horsies!”  
Said  
Tuuri Fair

They were in  
Mora  
Mora  
Window shopping  
All the way

But Torbjorn  
Would complain  
To be a pain  
On this so  
Nice  
Day


	15. The “Mary Poppins” Prologue Suite

=15-20=  
The “Mary Poppins” Prologue Suite  
All songs by R.B. & R.M. Sherman  
+  
Norway -- “Keep Granny Safe”  
from [“Let’s Go Fly a Kite”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oBkSy3dnIY8)

Gunnar, please, please do me this boon  
I don’t know, we might not have room  
We were going to get booze  
Not give Granny a cruise  
But you’re not listening  
Oh, Gunnar, you’re a king!

Please bring Granny back  
From her old, run-down shack  
See, she’s all alone  
The Rash is coming  
To me, she’s very dear  
Please bring her right back here  
Oh, Gunnar, you’re a king!

I don’t see why I need to come  
This whole Rash thing seems so dumb  
Oh, my dear Granny, please  
It would put me at ease  
*Grumble* Oh, very well  
Thank you, Gran! I’ll send help

And they will  
Please bring Granny back  
From her old, run-down shack  
Gunnar, you’re a king  
To do this for me  
Soon, I’ll have Granny here  
To me, she’s very dear  
Oh, Gunnar, you’re a king!

+  
Denmark -- “I Hate My Job”  
from [“I Love to Laugh”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pOMqqI-kzHY)

Turn us around!  
I need to go back home!  
Turn us around!  
Or I’ll litigate everyone!

Oh, Signe, please!  
Calm down the angry man!  
Oh, Signe, please!  
We think that only you can!  
I’LL LITIGATE YOU ALL!  
We’re sure that only you can!

Oh, you say you have a meeting  
You’ll be fired if you miss  
I’ll just mime calling the captain for you  
He says the Bahamas are first

You should be fired!  
Not work at all!  
Hey boss, I’m trying to get back--  
Now I’m a bum  
Who should hang out on farms

Oh, what can it be this time?  
I’m a fat, ugly slob  
And a bum with nothing to do  
I think you’re big-boned  
And I’ve been let go  
So I’m unemployed too

I like your cat  
Magnus is his name  
Mine is Michael  
Signe is mine just the same

My sister’s farm  
Is where I’m going to stay  
Will you come with me?  
I think I could see my way

+  
Finland -- “The Loons Migrate”  
from [“A Jolly Holliday”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IFGdlSbJAUE)

It’ll be a great vacation, you’ll see  
Just ignore their craziness  
Don’t you worry about  
Your old witch boss  
Or about this whole Rash mess

Now isn’t this better than waiting tables?  
She shut the restaurant down now  
Anyway

And while you’re with us dear  
We’ll make it clear  
We’ll shut off all the news  
While you are here

And it’ll be a great vacation, you’ll see  
Just spending time with  
People that we love!

+  
Sweden -- “A Lonely Trip”  
from [“Feed the Birds”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMggqNKTrfE)

All alone  
Fighting snow  
On a long, winding road  
A single Saab sedan was bound

With a fam’ly within  
Trekking to their cabin  
Where safety from Rash may be found

Querulous elders and  
Restless young sprouts  
Kvetch and complain  
All the way

Until Father steps in  
Reining in his odd kin  
They flee from the end of the world

Save yourselves  
Flee from the Rash  
Run off  
Hide out  
Flee from the Rash

Death is come  
Flee from the Rash  
And so they run  
They so dread the Rash

+  
Iceland -- “Hold the Line”  
from [“Feed the Birds”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMggqNKTrfE)

All around us the nations  
Have all fallen Silent  
As each one succumbed to the Rash  
And still boats of Infected  
They make for our waters  
And we can’t even let one slip past

Though we all  
Despise what we do  
Stay strong  
Stand fast  
We must all be true

Hold the line  
Against the Rash  
Stay strong  
Stand fast  
Against the Rash

Oh, Doc Petur, I can’t do  
This thing we’ve been doing  
Anymore, I just want to go back  
I can’t sleep for my nightmares  
And days are no better  
Oh, all right. Quarantine for two weeks

Herding sheep  
That’s my new life  
Farming  
Ranching  
Maybe a wife

And my kin  
Shall stay at hand  
Never  
To leave  
My dear Iceland

Leave the world  
Mind our affairs  
And then  
Perhaps  
We will be spared

Never leave  
My dear Iceland  
Then all  
Will be  
Well again

+  
Year 90 -- “Life Goes on”  
from [“A British Bank”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WDbOK_fDu9Y)

Are you the group  
Applying for funding?  
No, we are here to make a complaint  
That is the office down the hall  
Or there’s a number to call  
We’re old, and can’t afford a phone

The pavement’s cracked  
Right outside your building  
In fact, it could be hazardous now  
I hate old people rambling on  
Here, now, begone!  
Don’t let the pavement trip you up!

The Council held  
A vote on your project  
Though I’m not sure they all understood  
It passed, but by a single vote  
So please, take note  
You’ll get no more than we’ve set here

We will accept  
Your generous offer  
We’ll make it work on this budget, too  
When winter comes, we’ll send them out  
It’s true, without a doubt  
Our team will probe the Silent World!

What shall we do?  
It’s far, far too little  
To get a crew as large as we’ll need  
Stop pouting like a spoiled brat!  
The prospectus has fat  
For us to trim away, you’ll see

And so we’ve cut  
As much as we dare to  
From 8 to 5, and them idiots  
This bunch of weirdos we’ll acquire  
No one else would hire  
I just hope that they’ll survive this


	16. It’s a Simple Little Mission

=21=  
Pg 136  
“It’s a Simple Little Mission”  
from [“It’s a Simple Little System”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rccTav52lAI)  
by J. Styne

E=Emil, T=Tuuri, B=Torbjorn

B: It’s a simple little mission  
And we hope you understand  
You the skald and your four team-mates  
Will explore the Silent Lands

Such a simple little mission  
But one part we’ve kept from you  
While you’re there we have a  
List of books for  
You to bring back, too

B: How’s your Icelandic?  
T: Passable  
B: And your Danish, child?  
T: Pretty good  
B: And for you Emil--  
E: I don’t care

B: Emil, what is it?  
E: Why was this not mentioned once?  
B: Well, it’s secret, boy!  
E: You’d better not rip me off!  
B: Don’t you worry now  
E: Oh, we’ll talk about this more!  
B: Once you get back  
With the books

B: Here are ancient maps  
T: These should help  
B: Old newspapers clips  
T: These as well  
B: And a camera  
T: A real camera

B: That’s the lot of it  
E: How much cash are we to get?  
B: Ah, that’s what I thought  
E: You’d better not rip me off!  
B: Don’t you worry now  
E: Oh, we will talk about this more!  
B: Once you get back  
With the books

B: It’s a simple little mission  
And we’re chafing to begin  
We’ll take the Dalahasten  
And meet the others going in

B: Then you’ll cross over to Denmark  
And get the precious tomes  
Which we’ll trade for stacks of money  
Once you have them safely home

All: We’ll be rich!  
We’ll be rich!  
We’ll be rich!

T&B: Older books are worth a lot  
To the right collectors so  
If our crew can find some  
They’ll sell for an obscene amount  
Everything is settled then  
Finding some should be a cinch  
Trekking through the Silent World

B: Come on, Emil! Let’s get into it!

T: With these maps and this old book list  
E: You’d better not be scheming!  
T: Our full crew is so Fortune-kissed  
E: Or, even worse yet, dreaming!  
T: Our two seniors are so expert  
E: I warn you!  
T: This mission will succeed  
I can tell it!

B: Bring the books back!  
E&T: For the money!  
For the money!

B: Bring the books back!  
E&T: For the money!  
For the money!

All: Oh, what a mission!


	17. The Rash Is My Master

=22=  
Pg 275  
“The Rash Is My Master”  
from [“Nothing Else Matters”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tAGnKpE4NCI)  
by Metallica

My dreams now never to be  
Looking at myself what I see  
A corpse but one that’s walking free  
The Rash is my master

Wanted to see the world someday  
Life is good but it slips away  
And here I forever lay  
The Rash is my master

None of us wants to die like this  
And to think how much I will miss  
Ignorance of my fate would be bliss  
The Rash is my master

Never felt such pain before  
Never felt Death get so close  
Even so

My dreams now never to be  
Looking at myself what I see  
A corpse but one that’s walking free  
The Rash is my master

Never felt such pain before  
Never felt Death get so close  
Even so

Wanted to see the world someday  
Life is good but it slips away  
And here I forever lay  
The Rash is my master

None of us wants to die like this  
And to think how much I will miss  
Ignorance of my fate would be bliss  
The Rash is my master

Never felt such pain before  
Never thought there could be more  
Never wanted just to die  
Never felt Death get so close  
Even so

My dreams now never to be  
Looking at myself what I see  
A corpse but one that’s walking free  
The Rash is my master


	18. This Gorgeous Moment

=23=  
Pg 276  
“This Gorgeous Moment”  
from [“The Sound of Silence”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4fWyzwo1xg0)  
by Simon & Garfunkel

Hello duckies  
My old friends  
I left my bread  
Back in the glen  
Oh Duckies please look  
Far below you  
See the beasts and  
Maybe trolls too  
So the grosslings  
That are on the hunt for meat  
They won’t eat  
And hurt this gorgeous moment

So many horrors  
Have we seen  
In these Danish  
Lands unclean  
And now sheltered  
On this old bridge  
We feel our terror ease  
Just a smidge  
When we saw the things  
Coming up from beneath you two  
Yes it’s true  
It broke this gorgeous moment

Foolish ducks  
I tell you go  
Grosslings want to  
Eat you so  
Heed my warnings  
You might quack on  
Not for grosslings  
To light snack on  
But these birds  
Like silly pigeons stayed  
Quacks they made  
Echoed in this gorgeous moment

Yes these birds  
Sublimely stayed  
Sitting targets  
Duckies made  
As the cat hissed out  
Its warning  
To the birds  
On that sweet morning  
And the mage said  
The birds and the grosslings are  
So familiar with this stream  
Just like a dream  
Enchanted in this gorgeous moment


	19. The Simon & Garfunkel Chapter 1 Suite

=24-26=  
Pg 117  
The Simon & Garfunkel Chapter 1 Suite  
+  
“Lalli Goes to Mora”  
from [“The Boxer”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3LFML_pxlY)

I was just off my shift  
When I saw my cousin’s note  
“Come to us! Your boss is waiting!  
“To the docked paddlewheeler  
“And our new future!”  
If I had known  
Still from that first miserable night  
What lovely seeds have grown

Onni was upset  
That his family  
Should choose danger overseas  
And he blamed our cousin Taru  
But she offered him a safe position  
Anyway  
He said no  
Though his only kin were leaving  
From Keuruu he couldn’t go  
And the look on his face  
Said it was a blow

After seasickness so awful  
I would swear I should be dead  
We arrived in Sweden  
And were greeted by our new  
Companion, one ‘Emil’  
A messy Swede  
With gold hair that sparkled in the sun  
A strange young man indeed

Then I’m running through the big station  
So we won’t miss our train  
Moving on  
Over muddy puddles trying  
Hard to trip me up  
Caught the train  
Moving on

When the Swede got food I watched him  
Hoping for a messy scene  
But instead I got his patty  
And he went back to get some more  
So we could both eat our fill  
And without a word of blame  
As the train went on to Mora  
Rolling down the sheltered lane

+  
“Exploring”  
from [“Cecilia”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e5uei2AFEaQ)

Exploring  
I’ve waited so long  
This yearning’s so strong  
And soon I will  
Go exploring  
I’ll be there so soon  
Though I’m not Immune  
To the Rash

Exploring  
I’ve waited so long  
This yearning’s so strong  
And soon I will  
Go exploring  
I’ll be there so soon  
Though I’m not Immune  
To the Rash  
To the Rash

Overnight paddlewheeler trip  
I thought, “Really  
“This whole thing’s a gyp.”  
Wooden shutters came down soon  
Though Vellamo protects  
Shusher cat shushed us too

Exploring  
I’ve waited so long  
This yearning’s so strong  
And soon I will  
Go exploring  
I’ll be there so soon  
Though I’m not Immune  
To the Rash

A new nation  
The Swedes are so tall  
Except our compatriot Emil

A new nation  
The Swedes are so tall  
Except our compatriot Emil

+  
“Sparkély Hair”  
from [“Scarborough Fair”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Jj4s9I-53g)

He’s a Cleanser  
With sparkély hair  
And a really bad sense of time  
He got to the Björköfjärden Station  
And found degradation sublime

He had to sleep on a filthy old bench  
(Germophobia would be a rational thing)  
Like his aunt and uncle before  
(In time of winnowing by Rash disease)  
Pretend to read a book instead  
(Sleeping on benches is strictly forbidden)  
Well at least there wouldn’t be more  
(Dreams of a meal made of pasta meatballs)

Pasta fell on him with time to set in  
(Vivacious party behind him the culprits)  
And it stained his so spotless shirt  
(Diner apologized mopping the spill)  
He wanted so much to make an impression  
(So the Finns would like him and ev’rything would go well)  
When he did it only did hurt

He’s a Cleanser  
With sparkély hair  
And a really bad sense of time  
He got to the Björköfjärden Station  
And found degradation sublime


	20. Braidy’s World

=27=  
Pg 277  
“Braidy’s World”  
from [“Barbie Girl”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZyhrYis509A)  
by Aqua

(Spoken)  
E: Hey, Braidy!  
B: Emil!  
E: You wanna join up with us?  
B: Sure, Emil!  
E: Come on!

(Sung)  
Braidy’s not a girl  
This is Braidy’s world  
With a kitty  
Oh so pretty

Moisture in the air  
Might frizz poor Emil’s hair  
But such a braid now  
Can’t frizz--I don’t see how

Come on Braidy  
Don’t be ‘fraidy

Braidy’s not a girl  
This is Braidy’s world  
With a kitty  
Oh so pretty

Moisture in the air  
Might frizz poor Emil’s hair  
But such a braid now  
Can’t frizz--I don’t see how

He’s a mage with a mane  
From which he got his name  
And he’s roving around  
In the Silence

Come along  
With a song  
Our adventures await  
We’ll be buds  
Come with us  
And we’ll show you

Will they have  
Enough food  
Even for  
This rangy dude?

Braidy’s not a girl  
This is Braidy’s world  
With a kitty  
Oh so pretty

Moisture in the air  
Might frizz poor Emil’s hair  
But such a braid now  
Can’t frizz--I don’t see how

Come on Braidy  
Don’t be ‘fraidy  
Ha ha ha ha  
Come on Braidy  
Don’t be ‘fraidy  
Ooh-oh-ooh  
Ooh-oh-ooh

Come on Braidy  
Don’t be ‘fraidy  
Ha ha ha ha  
Come on Braidy  
Don’t be ‘fraidy  
Ooh-oh-ooh  
Ooh-oh-ooh

Doesn’t know  
He’s a mage  
But he’s in Lalli’s dreams  
Running over the waves  
And just stealing the scenes  
Come with us  
Little cuss  
Cause it’s better with friends  
Give a hand  
Silent Lands  
We’re exploring

Will they have  
Enough food  
Even for  
This rangy dude?

Will they have  
Enough food  
Even for  
This rangy dude?

Come on Braidy  
Don’t be ‘fraidy  
Ha ha ha ha  
Come on Braidy  
Don’t be ‘fraidy  
Ooh-oh-ooh  
Ooh-oh-ooh

Come on Braidy  
Don’t be ‘fraidy  
Ha ha ha ha  
Come on Braidy  
Don’t be ‘fraidy  
Ooh-oh-ooh  
Ooh-oh-ooh

Braidy’s not a girl  
This is Braidy’s world  
With a kitty  
Oh so pretty

Moisture in the air  
Might frizz poor Emil’s hair  
But such a braid now  
Can’t frizz--I don’t see how

Braidy’s not a girl  
This is Braidy’s world  
With a kitty  
Oh so pretty

Moisture in the air  
Might frizz poor Emil’s hair  
But such a braid now  
Can’t frizz--I don’t see how

Come on Braidy  
Don’t be ‘fraidy  
Ha ha ha ha  
Come on Braidy  
Don’t be ‘fraidy  
Ooh-oh-ooh  
Ooh-oh-ooh

Come on Braidy  
Don’t be ‘fraidy  
Ha ha ha ha  
Come on Braidy  
Don’t be ‘fraidy  
Ooh-oh-ooh  
Ooh-oh-ooh

(Spoken)  
B: This is going to be so much fun, Emil!  
E: Ah, Braidy, you sure got that right!  
B: Oh, I love you guys!


	21. The Cleanser Anthem

=28=  
Pg 119  
The Cleanser Anthem  
from [“Turn the World Around”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tPaKWihFs_Q)  
by Harry Belafonte

We came from the city  
Grosslings took the city  
Now we're back and now we  
Burn the city down

Cleansers use the fire  
Emil loves the fire  
Only through the fire  
Will grosslings go down

We go to the Silence  
Pushing back the Silence  
Fire kills the Silence  
Burn the city down

Winter's cold kills the rest  
Then go in find the nests  
Nothing can escape our Cleansing  
All around we're the best

Fighting  
Back the night  
Good bye to Silence  
Good bye night

Fighting  
Back the night  
Good bye to Silence  
Good bye night

Grosslings stalking our lands  
Looking to destroy Man  
Fire cleanses the land  
Burn the city down

Grosslings hate the sunlight  
They prefer a warm night  
Fire burns them so bright  
Burn the city down

Animals can live here  
Farmers grow their crops here  
After Cleansing's done here  
Burn the city down

We destroy the hiisi  
Grosslings run when they see  
How it came about we  
Burn the city down

Sniff out the Grossling nests  
Blow them up that's what's best  
Then the winter kills intruders  
When spring comes sweep the rest

Fighting  
Back the night  
Good bye to Silence  
Good bye night

Fighting  
Back the night  
Good bye to Silence  
Good bye night


	22. Waiting for Braidy (Meta)

=29=  
Pg 277

“Waiting for Braidy (Meta)”  
from [“Does Your Chewing Gum Lose Its Flavor on the Bedpost Overnight”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PPA8jXxCd5M)  
by Lonnie Donegan

Soon Braidy will appear  
And all will become clear  
Minna’s teasing  
Pretty soon now will be ceasing  
And all of us will see  
This character Braidy  
But will he fit in with the group?  
She’ll tell us presently

Will the pretty braid lose its luster  
Once he’s part of our main crew?  
After Minna’s finished teasing  
Will he fade out from our view?  
Will he be a welcome add-on  
Or be without a clue?  
Will his pretty braid lose its luster  
Once he’s part of our main crew?

Soon all of Braidy’s fans  
Will jump right up and dance  
Minna’s writing  
Is always so exciting!  
His introduction scene  
Will coronate her queen  
Of drama, comedy, horror  
And all things in between

But

Will the pretty braid lose its luster  
Once he’s part of our main crew?  
Will his fan club start deserting  
Or will all of them stay true?  
Minna warned he’s kind of useless  
So what will Braidy do?  
Will the pretty braid lose its luster  
Once he’s part of our main crew?

We’re counting the days down  
Until we meet this clown  
How will it be?  
In the picture set by the sea?  
With questions we are rife  
But there’s no need for strife  
When Minna brings him in we’ll see  
He’s not larger than life

Will the pretty braid lose its luster  
So the fangirls will not swoon?  
Will they still be like coyotes  
Howling at him like the moon?  
Will there be as much confusion  
As with David Lynch’s Dune?  
Will the pretty braid lose its luster  
After we meet him real soon?

The shippers out on deck  
Might get a nasty check  
Group Dynamics  
I hope nobody panics  
Playing our fandom games  
Like portmanteau-style names  
Will all our favorite friendships last  
Or just go down in flames?

Will the pretty braid lose its luster  
Once he’s part of our main crew?  
When he’s stuck outside with Tuuri  
Or with Mikkel will he do?  
Will he get on well with Sigrun  
Or will Emil hate that too?  
Will the pretty braid lose its luster  
Once he’s part of our main crew?

Once he’s  
Part of  
Our  
Main  
Crew

(Minnions at the ready  
To see Braidy join the crew  
Minna holding steady  
“She will do what she will do”)

Once he’s  
Part of  
Our  
Main  
Crew

(Chapter break is dragging  
So we’ll all just speculate  
To keep us from flagging  
As we settle in to wait)

Once he’s  
Part of  
Our  
Main  
Crew!


	23. Pressin’ the F5

=30=  
Pg 277

“Pressin’ the F5”  
from [“Prayin’ for Daylight”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L8GucowJgV4)  
by Rascal Flatts

Minna’s got her fans  
All huddled on our knees

I’ve done the archive binge  
Both here and on  
A Red-Tail’s Dream again  
Read all the comments long  
And sung all the filk songs  
Now I’m back to

Pressin’ the F5  
Hopin’ for a new update  
Long past our bedtime  
But we never care how late  
Minna deliver us  
From our withdrawal please  
You’ve got your fans  
All huddled on our knees  
Pressin’ the F5

It doesn’t sound so long  
A little break  
To build the buffer up  
But now we’re stuck in it  
And no light at  
The tunnel’s end so we’re

Pressin’ the F5  
Hopin’ for a new update  
Long past our bedtime  
But we never care how late  
Minna deliver us  
From our withdrawal please  
You’ve got your fans  
All huddled on our knees  
Pressin’ the F5

Pressin’ the F5  
Pressin’ the F5

Feeding our addiction  
To this tale  
Waiting for the  
Next bit Minna regales

New chapter’s coming soon  
That’s what we say  
Our mantra to ourselves  
We’re more than halfway through  
The current break  
And we know what we must do

Pressin’ the F5  
Hopin’ for a new update  
Long past our bedtime  
But we never care how late  
Minna deliver us  
From our withdrawal please  
You’ve got your fans  
All huddled on our knees  
Pressin’ the F5

Pressin’ the F5  
Hopin’ for a new update  
Long past our bedtime  
But we never care how late  
Minna deliver us  
From our withdrawal please  
You’ve got your fans  
All huddled on our knees  
Pressin’ the F5

Pressin’ the F5  
Minna’s got her fans  
All huddled on our knees  
Minna’s got her fans  
All huddled on our knees

Pressin’ the F5  
Minna’s got her fans  
All huddled on our knees

Pressin’ the F5


	24. Cleanser Recruiting Song

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's interesting that the two best known Village People songs are both recruiting jingles.

=31=  
Pg 118

...Because “In the Navy” would’ve been way too easy.

“Cleanser Recruiting Song”  
from [“YMCA”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QINoUyrP0BI)  
by the Village People

People  
Are you drifting through life  
Without purpose  
With a heart full of strife  
Come and join us  
Make the most of your life  
Cause you can serve your fellow Swedes

Come on  
Turn your sad life around  
Come and join us  
Change the way that you’re bound  
Be a Cleanser  
A new meaning you’ve found  
And you can be the one who leads

Come on and sign with the  
Cleansers today  
Come on and sign with the  
Cleansers today  
Make all the grosslings run  
From your all-cleansing flame  
Make even giants fear your name

Come on and sign with the  
Cleansers today  
Come on and sign with the  
Cleansers today  
Hear the Motherland’s call  
Redeem the Silent Lands  
We need the strength in your good hands

People  
Was your village destroyed  
Come avenge them  
Ev’ry man, girl and boy  
This is our land  
And we’re taking it back  
But we need you to join the pack

Join us  
Join the Cleansers today  
Join the future  
As we carve out a way  
Fight the darkness  
With our all-cleansing flame  
And you will never be the same

Come on and sign with the  
Cleansers today  
Come on and sign with the  
Cleansers today  
Make all the grosslings run  
From your all-cleansing flame  
Make even giants fear your name

Come on and sign with the  
Cleansers today  
Come on and sign with the  
Cleansers today  
Hear the Motherland’s call  
Redeem the Silent Lands  
We need the strength in your good hands

People  
We were all once like you  
Av’rage people  
Our old lives made us blue  
But now people  
There’s something you can do  
Come join a fellowship that’s true

Be a Cleanser  
Think of the stakes  
Come and join us  
Show you’ve got what it takes  
Join the Cleansers  
It’ll be your best break  
E’en if you’ve made a few mistakes

Come on and sign with the  
Cleansers today  
Come on and sign with the  
Cleansers today  
I said people  
Are you drifting through life  
Without purpose  
With a heart full of strife

Cleansers today  
Come on  
Join in the  
Cleansers today


	25. The Black Noise

=32=  
Pg 228

“The Black Noise”  
from [“Killing Me Softly”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kgl-VRdXr7I)  
by Roberta Flack

It all began with sickness  
Such pain I thought I’d die  
But then my body twisted  
Misshapen--no hint why  
I had become a monster  
Without a voice to cry

Screamin’ my pain  
Through the ether  
Tryin’ to understand why  
Longin’ for nothin’  
But surcease  
Longin’ for nothin’  
But surcease  
Screamin’ all across  
The spectrum  
Longin’ for nothin’  
But surcease

This carcass won’t obey me  
I’m trapped inside myself  
And I can’t even talk to  
Ask someone for their help  
This prison once my person  
Holds me here as I am

Screamin’ my pain  
Through the ether  
Tryin’ to understand why  
Longin’ for nothin’  
But surcease  
Longin’ for nothin’  
But surcease  
Screamin’ all across  
The spectrum  
Longin’ for nothin’  
But surcease

I’m living out a nightmare  
Bound here with no release  
And so I scream silently  
When will this torment cease?  
It’s been this way for so long  
Torment everlasting

Screamin’ my pain  
Through the ether  
Tryin’ to understand why  
Longin’ for nothin’  
But surcease  
Longin’ for nothin’  
But surcease  
Screamin’ all across  
The spectrum  
Longin’ for nothin’  
But surcease

Screamin’ my pain  
Through the ether  
Tryin’ to understand why  
Longin’ for nothin’  
But surcease  
Longin’ for nothin’  
But surcease  
Screamin’ all across  
The spectrum  
Longin’ for

Now I’m  
Screamin’ my pain  
Yeah, ‘cause I  
Can’t understand  
Longin’ for nothin’  
But surcease  
Longin’ for nothin’  
But surcease  
Screamin’ all across  
The spectrum  
Longin’ for nothin’  
But surcease


	26. The “Oliver!” Chapter Two Suite

=33-37=  
Pg 141  
The “Oliver!” Chapter Two Suite  
from the motion picture “Oliver!”  
by Carol Reed

The “twist” I mentioned earlier is that each song is in the order it was presented in the movie (NOT the play) with none omitted or reordered until the last.

+  
“Entering Mora”  
from [“Food, Glorious Food”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ly7PONiKGUs)

Pulling in the station now  
Ev’rybody’s getting out  
Here we go now into Mora

Heading through the shower part  
Right behind some ancient fart  
Payment to get into Mora

Snug in our robes  
In the lounge  
We will wait  
We will wait  
For our numbers to flash

But while Emil was caught out  
Without a permit  
Lalli grabbed up his stuff  
And encountered

A sidewalk that MOVES  
What magic could this be?  
How wondrous it proves  
But no one else can see

Just testing it proved it safe  
But once near the ending  
Poor Lalli tried to walk back  
Tuuri stopped him

Ew, moose  
Big, ugly and deformed  
That isn’t a moose  
Do try to stay informed

A horse is an animal  
Quite diff’rent from moose  
Oh, please  
Sir, may we pet  
Your horsies so  
Adorable?

They took ev’rything  
All my neat explosives  
They could have done worse  
Then where would we all be

Lalli, you should mind your hair  
There, now, that’s much better  
Now you don’t look like a bum  
Or a beggar

Well, let us be off  
Our HQ is nearby  
We’ll kit you out there  
We have a few hours

Sveavagen  
Then takes us  
To Oresundbro  
So on  
To our HQ  
Where we can do  
What we need to  
Visit your brood  
Now, don’t be rude  
On to HQ

Oh, can we take a horse carriage ride?  
No, dear, walking is cheap--uh, healthy  
Oh well

+  
“Present Blessings”  
from [“Oliver!”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nlJugdk4OGc)

Watch out  
This way  
Come on  
Hurry  
All the traffic  
Makes it hard to be quick

Now that we’re done wasting our time  
Window shopping HQ  
Is a block this way  
Oh, all right

Isn’t our  
Capital  
The most impressive place  
You’ve ever been?

Well it is  
Pretty neat  
Frankly though I thought there’d  
Be more machines

Though the horses are cool  
I thought there’d be  
More technology

Well, for commoners it’s  
Much too expensive  
They’re just for the milit’ry

But our lights  
Always work  
Lighting the streets without  
Even a quirk

And in ev’ry home  
There is a phone line  
And it works

Add to that  
Now we have  
A public radio  
System in place

Can you say  
That you have  
Something like that back where  
You two come from?

No, we don’t and that is  
Pretty impressive  
I must admit

But the coolest part is  
Just how safe ev’ryone  
Feels here in Mora Town

It’s like no  
One’s afraid  
There’ll be an outbreak in  
Mora today

Does that happen often  
I mean where you live?

Never... now

+  
“Past Reflections”  
from [“Boy for Sale”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M4CVZnGJIzQ)

Before  
We three moved  
To Keruu Town  
We all lived in Saimaa  
A big lake system

And towns  
There are spread  
Out far and wide  
Making it quite easy  
To keep each one safe

Even the villages  
Where there’s almost  
No one immune  
With a few  
Simple measures

But a trade route  
Might vanish to boot  
From year to year  
An island somewhere  
Might be  
Stricken  
Gone

We’re always watching  
Always very careful  
We dare not let our  
Guard down anytime

We lived  
And we laughed  
But it was just  
Something that could happen  
Anytime  
Always

+  
“Words Kind and Unkind”  
from [“Where is Love?”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WjJDekSculo)

Here we are now at our home  
The last nice thing that we own  
Go cling on your father if you please  
And Cousin Emil’s knees

I’ll show you around the place  
Kids get out of Lalli’s face  
Kiddies are so cute! You’re kinda fat  
Your parents don’t love you

Here are files on each of us  
[Emil’s story is discussed]  
And regarding skills--this mage title  
It’s not so literal  
Yes they’re really true  
And I’ll get him to show you

Lalli, can you do a spell?  
Something small for show and tell?  
Emil thinks that magic isn’t true  
Doesn’t it bother you?  
I don’t really care  
He’s not feeling up to it

+  
“Future Plans/And We’re Off!”  
from [“Consider Yourself”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e0gNMQsImoQ)

We’ll be ready soon  
To go  
The babysitter?  
We got it sorted out  
Here, Tuuri, as you’re  
The skald  
These piles  
File  
What you need to get out  
Your seniors are up  
To speed  
On ev’rything here  
On the “Try to find” list  
Emil, you can look  
Don’t care  
I don’t need  
Info to do my job

I don’t remember this  
Book salvation stuff from our  
Mission statement from  
Before  
That’s because on the sly  
While you’re out there researching  
We can do well on the side

How well can we do?  
Ah, yes  
By getting old books  
Clean up!  
How much are we discussing and  
What is my share?  
We’ll talk about it  
Once you’re back

You’d better not plan  
To cheat  
You’d better not plan  
To rip me off Uncle  
We’re all ready now  
To go  
Let’s leave  
Please  
Before it starts to rain

Oh, Cousin Emil  
Don’t go!  
You just arrived here  
We didn’t get to play  
Hairdresser salon  
With you  
Oh, please, stay  
Here and we’ll have such fun!

Sorry, I’ve got to go  
And I’ll be away for months  
Don’t get in the dumps  
Children  
Daddy will be home soon  
Whoop-de-do (that’s sarcasm)  
Sorry, kids, I’ve got to go

Oh, Cousin Emil  
Goodbye  
Please come back again  
Real soon  
For hairdresser salon is quite  
Our fav’rite game  
Goodbye little brats!  
Hug hug hug

Get your umbrellas guys  
Rain is pouring from the skies  
And I’ve got to drag  
This cart  
Just think of all the cash  
We’ll rake in when they get back  
As we walk along the  
Walk along the streets  
Walk along the streets  
Walk along the streets  
Walk along the streets  
Walk along the streets  
Walk along the streets  
Along the streets

We’re finally here  
At last  
You know all these signs  
Look pretty ominous  
Don’t worry about  
Those, guys!  
In fact  
It’s  
A blessing in disguise

The station looks like  
It’s closed  
The public thinks so  
But it’s been running well  
Our ride’s been arranged  
From here  
Through miles of  
Silent Lands to the south

The Dalahasten train  
Rides the Svea-a-vagen line  
And it’s right on time  
For us  
We get on here and go  
South to Oresu-undbro  
And kit you out with your bus!

The station looks grim  
And cold  
Appearances don’t  
Mean much  
It’s open for the military  
And for us  
To Oresundbro  
To Oresundbro  
To Oresundbro  
We are off!


	27. The Saga of Braidy’s Hair

=38=  
Pg 277

Because there weren’t enough comments on this page already, obviously

“The Saga of Braidy’s Hair”  
from [“The Ballad of Davy Crockett”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=txcRQedoEyY)  
(6 verses)

Born in fair Iceland  
Far across the sea  
Herded sheep  
Since he was only three  
Though warned against it  
From his Pappy’s knee  
Had him a yearning  
For the world to see

Braidy  
Braidy Shepherd  
Lost in the Silent World

He crossed the ocean  
We know not how  
He came to Denmark  
And said, “Oh, wow!”  
Though all the grosslings  
Were a-sleeping now  
Our Braidy’s excitement  
Would stir up quite a row

Braidy  
Braidy Shepherd  
A tourist in Denmark

While he was dreaming  
Of running free  
Across deep water  
In nice robes he  
Caught the attention  
Of our mage Lalli  
Trying to get hold  
Of his cousin Onni

Braidy  
Braidy Shepherd  
His name we still don’t know

When Lalli went back  
To find this guy  
He’d just plain vanished  
I wonder why?  
In disappointment  
Lalli heaved a sigh  
And that was the ending  
To Chapter Five

Braidy  
Braidy Shepherd  
The one who won’t appear

He’s in the promos  
With all the guys  
And in the group shots  
He don’t look wise  
Sheepish his grin and  
Wide are his eyes  
When we finally meet him  
It’ll be a surprise!

Braidy  
Braidy Shepherd  
So goofy is his grin

Minna has promised us  
That he’ll appear  
She didn’t say when  
It could be next year  
It’s already plotted  
Minna won’t play by ear  
But she’ll stir the pot up  
For her audience dear

Braidy  
Braidy Shepherd  
Luring new readers in


	28. Moon, Shine Your Light Down

=39=  
Pg 148  
“Moon, Shine Your Light Down”  
from [“Weave Me the Sunshine”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ddkS3dywaPw)  
by Peter Yarrow

Moon, Moon,  
Moon, shine your light down  
Break through the fallin’ rain  
Shine down on us  
As we make our journey  
And protect  
Our little train

Let your light  
Hold back the grosslings  
Watch over our train  
Keep us safe  
From evil ghost-things  
Watch over our train

Moon, Moon,  
Moon, shine your light down  
Break through the fallin’ rain  
Shine down on us  
As we make our journey  
And protect  
Our little train

Part the clouds  
Reveal your glory  
Watch over our train  
Comfort those  
Who always worry  
Watch over our train

Moon, Moon,  
Moon, shine your light down  
Break through the fallin’ rain  
Shine down on us  
As we make our journey  
And protect  
Our little train

Only you can  
Keep us safe now  
Watch over our train  
Cov’r us with your  
Wondrous soft glow  
Watch over our train

Moon, Moon,  
Moon, shine your light down  
Break through the fallin’ rain  
Shine down on us  
As we make our journey  
And protect  
Our little train


	29. Lalli-by

=40=  
Pg 214

“Lalli-by”  
from [“Hushabye”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0kugBjlnnaA)  
by the Beach Boys

[Please note: most ooh-oohs have been replaced with lyrics, as transcription cannot replicate such beautiful chords]

You twitch  
And you cry  
But soon all  
Will be alright

Rest easy, Lalli  
Don’t twitch or scream  
(Lalli, Lalli, Lalli-by)  
Sleep freely, Lalli  
Untouched by dreams  
(Lalli, Lalli, Lalli-by)

Lullaby, Lalli-by  
Scout so restless  
Help is nigh  
In the harsh grip  
Of the light  
Shining down so  
Green and bright

Rest easy, Lalli  
Don’t twitch or scream  
(Lalli, Lalli, Lalli-by)  
Sleep freely, Lalli  
Untouched by dreams  
(Lalli, Lalli, Lalli-by)

Lullaby  
(Rest easy now)  
Lalli-by  
(Don’t worry now)  
You are safe  
Your friends are nigh  
(Your friends are nigh)  
Lullaby  
(Rest easy now)  
Lalli-by  
(Don’t worry now)  
You are safe  
Your friends are nigh

See the worry  
On your face  
Keeping you from  
Rest’s embrace  
Put my hand  
Upon your brow  
Rest will come so  
Easy now

Rest easy, Lalli  
Don’t twitch or scream  
(Lalli, Lalli, Lalli-by)  
Sleep freely, Lalli  
Untouched by dreams  
(Lalli, Lalli, Lalli-by)

And now  
You are calm  
In the shade  
Of my palm


	30. Beyond the Scene

=41=  
Pg 285  
“Beyond the Scene”  
from [“Beyond the Sea”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8OlDPqYBLw)  
by Bobby Darin

Somewhere  
Beyond the scene  
Somewhere  
Not in-between  
Our Braidy stands  
With claspéd hands  
And waits for the day  
Minna updates

Somewhere  
Beyond the scene  
He’s there  
Not being seen  
Oh, what a joy  
This gangly boy  
Will give to the fans  
When he appears

So far  
We’ve had one word  
But still  
Fangirls will swoon  
And so  
We’ll all cry out,  
“Minna,  
Please bring him in soon!”

They’ll meet  
This hapless mage  
On some  
Double splash page  
And we will squee  
To fin’lly see  
Our Braidy appear  
With the whole team

And so  
We’ll all cry out,  
“Minna,  
Please bring him in soon!”  
They’ll meet  
(She swears they’ll meet)  
This hapless mage  
On some  
Double splash page  
And we will squee  
To fin’lly see  
Our Braidy appear  
With the whole team

That’s the whole team  
Need our whole team  
Minna’s whole team


	31. Captain Ása

=42=  
Pg 285

“Captain Ása”  
from [“In the Navy”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmGuy0jievs)  
by the Village People

Shanghaied to divert here  
Sending food to the pier  
Blackmailed by that demon Trond  
Had I any notion  
We’d be in the ocean  
Not trapped in this stinking pond

How on earth did he know  
Of my peccadillo  
Anyway it’s sink or swim  
If he ever tries to  
Spread his filthy lies to  
Anyone I’ll destroy him

Captain Ása  
Proud skipper of _Túnfiskurinn_  
Captain Ása  
Was friends with Trond but now hates him  
Captain Ása  
Sailing through oceans flecked with foam  
Captain Ása  
Captain Ása  
Shouting through the megaphone

Captain Ása  
Coming to our dear heroes’ aid  
Captain Ása  
Won’t come ashore, she’s too afraid  
Captain Ása  
She might yield our forthcoming Braid  
Captain Ása  
(Captain Ása)  
Captain Ása  
(Captain Ása)

_Tuna Fish_  
 _Tuna Fish_  
 _Tuna Fish_ is an awesome ship

_Tuna Fish_  
 _Tuna Fish_  
 _Tuna Fish_ is an awesome ship

She was calmly knitting  
On the daybed sitting  
When she got the curséd call  
At first she was so sure  
But then her composure  
Cracked as Trond explained it all

Just as soon as it’s time  
Fire the harpoon line  
Almost parting Emil’s hair  
Babbles in Icelandic  
No one understands it  
Tell me, people, is it fair?

Captain Ása  
Proud skipper of _Túnfiskurinn_  
Captain Ása  
Was friends with Trond but now hates him  
Captain Ása  
Sailing through oceans flecked with foam  
Captain Ása  
Captain Ása  
Shouting through the megaphone

Captain Ása  
Coming to our dear heroes’ aid  
Captain Ása  
Won’t come ashore, she’s too afraid  
Captain Ása  
She might yield our forthcoming Braid  
Captain Ása  
(Captain Ása)  
Captain Ása  
(Captain Ása)

_Tuna Fish_  
 _Tuna Fish_  
 _Tuna Fish_ is an awesome ship

_Tuna Fish_  
 _Tuna Fish_  
 _Tuna Fish_ is an awesome ship

_Tuna Fish_  
 _Tuna Fish_  
Captain Ása

_Tuna Fish_  
 _Tuna Fish_  
Captain Ása

_Tuna Fish_  
 _Tuna Fish_  
Captain Ása

_Tuna Fish_  
 _Tuna Fish_  
Captain Ása

_Tuna Fish_  
 _Tuna Fish_  
Captain Ása


	32. PAIN!!!!!

=43=  
Pg 286

Inspired by [alex’s comment](http://www.sssscomic.com/comic.php?page=286#comment-1923900484)

“PAIN!!!!!”  
from [“Fame!”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h1xO7RwTV4k)  
by Irene Cara

I was in a crate  
Hoping to find my fate  
Speeding from the ship to the shore  
Little knowing what was in store  
For me

Thought it would improve  
Once I had made my move  
But when I pushed up from the box  
The guy with sparkly locks  
Pushed me down again

PAIN!  
The lid slammed down on my hand  
My bones are screaming at me  
PAIN!  
Rippling out fit to beat the band  
They might be broken you see

PAIN!  
What did I do to deserve this?  
How did I earn their disdain?  
PAIN!  
The lid slammed down on my hand  
That lid is really my bane

Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts

This just takes the cake  
Never had a worse ache  
Let’s just hope the bones didn’t smash  
Healing that would take too much cash  
It’s true

When the lid came down  
Pain hit me like a crown, so  
Sharp and hard through my poor right hand  
Ow! I don’t understand!

PAIN!  
The lid slammed down on my hand  
My bones are screaming at me  
PAIN!  
Rippling out fit to beat the band  
They might be broken you see

PAIN!  
What did I do to deserve this?  
How did I earn their disdain?  
PAIN!  
The lid slammed down on my hand  
That lid is really my bane

Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts

[Musical interlude]

PAIN!  
The lid slammed down on my hand  
My bones are screaming at me  
PAIN!  
Rippling out fit to beat the band  
They might be broken you see

PAIN!  
What did I do to deserve this?  
How did I earn their disdain?  
PAIN!  
The lid slammed down on my hand  
That lid is really my bane

Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts  
Boy it hurts

PAIN!  
The lid slammed down on my hand  
PAIN!  
My bones are screaming at me  
PAIN!  
Rippling out fit to beat the band  
PAIN!  
They might be broken you see

PAIN!  
What did I do to deserve this?  
PAIN!  
How did I earn their disdain?  
PAIN!  
The lid slammed down on my hand  
PAIN!  
That lid is really my bane  
PAIN!


	33. The Sound of Squeeing

=44=  
Pg 287  
“The Sound of Squeeing”  
from [“The Sound of Music”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5fH2FOn1V5g)  
by R. Rogers & O. Hammerstein

The comments are filled  
With our thoughts on Braidy  
For him we did wait  
More than a full year

And Disqus will break  
From our comments flooding  
A load that their servers could  
Never bear

Our comments say  
“Drink!” and  
“You’re sure  
Braidy’s not  
A girl?”  
As some still  
Are confused

Our comments have  
Puns and  
Some games  
And cool  
User Names  
That our friends  
Go by

Our posters have  
Posters  
They bought  
To support  
Our dear  
Author  
Minna Sundberg

We squee at   
The thought  
That we’ll learn   
Braidy’s real name   
Today!

So flood the whole site  
With the sound of squeeing  
Our comments must flow  
As never before

Our comments are filled  
With the sound of squeeing  
Just one moment more


	34. Reynir the Red-Haired Goofball

=45=  
Pg 288  
“Reynir the Red-Haired Goofball”  
from [“Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ara3-hDH6I)  
by Gene Autry

We’ve met  
Tuuri  
And Mikkel  
And Lalli  
And Sigrun

Emil  
The Cleanser  
Who some call  
“The Buffoon”

Now at last we’ll meet  
The guy who  
Makes our team  
Complete

Reynir the Red-Haired Goofball  
Tried to get to Old Bornholm  
Rode on the _Túnfiskurinn_  
Now he’s far away from home

Few of the other teammates  
Even speak his only tongue  
Then there’s the cat-mage Lalli  
Who’s been acting so high strung

For when dreaming recently  
Reynir ran by him  
But when Lalli tried to talk  
Reynir stiffed him  
Lalli balks

Sigrun charged Emil sternly,  
“Watch over the prisoner”  
Reynir the Red-Haired Goofball  
You’ve a ways to go with her!


	35. The (Other) Voting Song

=46=  
Pg 288

“The (Other) Voting Song”  
from “Baby Face”  
by [Julie Andrews](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0qpMnCF1byo)

Vote for Minna!  
Vote for Minna!

Vote vote vote  
Because we love this epic comic  
Minna wrote  
It’s such a good way to show  
How we dote  
Vote vote vote

SSSS is awesome!

Vote vote vote  
Let’s show the whole world  
Just how good  
This comic is!  
Let all your votes flood in  
And you’ll see  
With a grin  
Minna rises  
To the top!

[Musical Interlude]

Keep on voting!  
Because we love this epic!  
Keep on voting!  
It’s such a good way to show  
How we dote  
Vote vote vote  
(Come on  
And get her  
First Place)

Keep on voting!  
Let’s show the whole world  
What a marvelous work  
SSSS is!  
Let your votes flood in  
And you’ll see  
With a grin  
Minna rises  
To the--  
Keep on voting!  
Keep on voting!  
Keep on voting!  
Vote her to the top!

Keep on voting!  
Vote vote vote vote!

Click [here](https://ssssforum.com/thingies/voting.html) to vote for SSSS & ARTD on the TopWebComics poll!


	36. The Wanderer’s Song

=47=  
Pg 292  
“The Wanderer’s Song”  
from “Follow Me”  
as featured on [Jim Henson’s Fraggle Rock](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUOwfbaKRgY)

All my childhood  
I was told the tales  
By my roving kin  
And I loved it so  
But it only  
Showed how I was dull  
Boring was my life  
How could I succeed?

I’m the youngest  
Of five kids  
All my elders  
Travel far and wide

Ev’ry tale they  
Told of their  
Adventures  
Stirred me up  
Inside  
And I felt the need

To find for myself  
Where the road  
Would take me  
Many miles  
From home  
And what I would see

So I set out  
One fine day  
Left the homestead  
Set out on my way

I was heading  
For Bornholm  
Just to have a  
Story of my own


	37. Old Bornholm

=48=  
Pg 295  
“Old Bornholm”  
from [“Kokomo”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tIieHL8LerI)  
by the Beach Boys

Away from  
The sheep farm  
What  
Could be the great harm?  
And into  
The wide world  
Vast  
Horizons unfurled  
So where will  
I go first?  
I’m so  
Glad I might burst  
To Bornholm!

I can’t wait to go see  
This new place called Old Bornholm  
Southernmost settlement  
The Danish paradise home

Unfamiliar land  
Colorful flowers and  
Sweet warm sand

Warmth and sun  
All year long  
Fills my heart with songs  
Of foreign lands  
All down in Old Bornholm

Away from  
The sheep farm  
What  
Could be the great harm of  
My leaving  
To wander  
Free  
To roam out yonder  
So where will  
I go first?  
I’m so  
(It looks)  
Glad I might burst  
(Like I’m going)  
Off to Old Bornholm  
It seems that’s where  
The Fates want me to roam  
So now that  
I’ve left home  
I’ll go to Old Bornholm  
So far  
So good  
Let all be as it should

Setting out to sea  
On the good ship _Túnfiskurinn_  
And I’m sure I will find  
It’s all my dreams have shown to me

I can hardly wait  
So soon I’ll  
Find my fate

So far away  
From my ken  
It should be perfect  
To fill my yen  
To go to Old Bornholm

Away from  
The sheep farm  
What  
Could be the great harm of  
My leaving  
To wander  
Free  
To roam out yonder  
So where will  
I go first?  
I’m so  
(It looks)  
Glad I might burst  
(Like I’m going)  
Off to Old Bornholm  
It seems that’s where  
The Fates want me to roam  
So now that  
I’ve left home  
I’ll go to Old Bornholm  
So far  
So good  
Let all be as it should

[Musical interlude]

Want to see it all  
But it is best to start out small  
And when I’m past this wall  
I’ll go to that port-of-call  
They call it Old Bornholm

Away from  
The sheep farm  
What  
Could be the great harm of  
My leaving  
To wander  
Free  
To roam out yonder  
So where will  
I go first?  
I’m so  
(It looks)  
Glad I might burst  
(Like I’m going)  
Off to Old Bornholm  
It seems that’s where  
The Fates want me to roam  
So now that  
I’ve left home  
I’ll go to Old Bornholm

Away from  
The sheep farm  
What  
Could be the great harm of  
My leaving  
To wander  
Free  
To roam out yonder  
So where will  
I go first?  
I’m so  
(It looks)  
Glad I might burst  
(Like I’m going)  
Off to Old Bornholm  
It seems that’s where  
The Fates want me to roam  
So now that  
I’ve left home  
I’ll go to Old Bornholm


	38. A Mother’s Lament

=49=  
Lachrymosity increases.  
Pg 294  
“A Mother’s Lament”  
from [“The Fisherman’s Song”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iC1ZY8SC4ew)  
by Silly Wizard

O’er a wide white oak table  
A woman is crying  
Strands of grey mixed with gold  
In her hair  
And behind her bent form stands  
Her russet-haired husband  
But for now she can find no  
Comfort there

For she has just read  
A note that starts, “Forgive me”  
And tells how her young Reynir  
Has fled  
He has gone to the seashore  
And means to go exploring  
Leaving them to fear that  
He’ll be dead

Her dear boy, her youngest  
The only non-immune  
Held at home while the  
Other four roamed  
Now she prayed to the gods  
All of them, and in order  
That her Reynir might find  
A safe way home

For she has just read  
A note that starts, “Forgive me”  
And tells how her young Reynir  
Has fled  
He has gone to the seashore  
And means to go exploring  
Leaving them to fear that  
He’ll be dead

[Instrumental interlude]

There’s a pasture of sheep now  
Awaiting their shepherd  
Knowing not that they wait  
In vain  
Nor can they hear the heartbreak  
Of Reynir’s dear parents  
Who don’t know if they’ll see  
Him again

For she has just read  
A note that starts, “Forgive me”  
And tells how her young Reynir  
Has fled  
He has gone to the seashore  
And means to go exploring  
Leaving them to fear that  
He’ll be dead

Wherefore did he flee?  
Whither hath he departed?  
And when shall he come home  
Again?  
These and more nightmare worries  
Will torment his fam’ly  
As the answers are quite  
Past their ken

For she has just read  
A note that starts, “Forgive me”  
And tells how her young Reynir  
Has fled  
He has gone to the seashore  
And means to go exploring  
Leaving them to fear that  
He’ll be dead

[Instrumental postlude]


	39. A Wand’ring Shepherd

=50=  
Pg 299  
“A Wand’ring Shepherd”  
from [“The Lonely Goatherd”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gRo0NlLYvwE)  
by R. Rogers & O. Hammerstein

Out from the farm  
Came a wand’ring shepherd  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh!  
Off on a lark  
Once he got the good word  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh di oh!

Many are they  
Think he’s like a dotard  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh!  
But he got through  
And meander’d boat-ward  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh di oh!

Oh, ho!  
Braidy’s name is Reynir  
Oh, ho!  
And he’s come to stay  
Oh, ho!  
Braidy’s name is Reynir  
And he came to us to stay

A newbie he was  
And they thought him wayward  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh!  
But then they thought  
Some free help they could afford  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh di oh!

Off to Bornholm  
Like a swift old seabird  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh!  
They wouldn’t land  
Was the bad news he heard  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh di oh!

Out to the quay  
Went our team ’cause they’d heard  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh!  
Their new supplies  
Would be there was the word  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh di oh!

Up from the crate  
Sprang a quite lost shepherd  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh!  
But Emil slammed  
Him back down without a word  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh di oh!

[Musical interlude]

And Emil (And Emil)  
Called to Sigrun (Called to Sigrun)  
“There’s a guy in here!” (“There’s a guy in here!”)  
Sigrun flipped out

Oh, ho, ho, ho  
Braidy’s name is Reynir  
Our Braidy’s name is Reynir  
And he’s come to stay  
Oh, ho, ho, ho  
Braidy’s name is Reynir  
And he came to us to stay

Out to the quay  
Went our team ’cause they’d heard  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh!  
Their new supplies  
Would be there was the word  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh di oh!

Up from the crate  
Sprang a quite lost shepherd  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh!  
But Emil slammed  
Him back down without a word  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh di oh!

Now Braidy’s here  
And his name is Reynir  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh!  
And our dear team  
Is at last complete with  
Braidy, oh the Braidy, oh di oh!

Though Sigrun  
Doesn’t want him (Doesn’t want him)  
Well they’re stuck with him (Well they’re stuck with him)  
Rage though she may (Rage though she may)

Now our shepherd’s in a fix (Now our shepherd’s in a fix)  
And with Lalli in the mix (And with Lalli in the mix)  
And now Emil caught betwixt (And now Emil caught betwixt)  
Reynir wishes he had never gone away  
DUH!


	40. Silent World

=51=  
Pg 299

Inspired by [Sunflower’s comment](http://www.sssscomic.com/comic.php?page=299#comment-1955926715) below.

“Silent World”  
from [“Moon River”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UV25eE0TH-Q)  
by H. Mancini

Silent World  
Shrouded now and strange  
What mysteries now range  
In you?  
Though not immune  
I hear the tune  
That calls me to  
Explore  
Your far shores  
It’s true

Though grosslings  
Try to block my way  
I’ll conquer all my days  
And so  
I’ll climb the next hill  
And go on  
Graceful as a swan  
With each and ev’ry dawn  
Silent World  
You’ll know


	41. Here’s Reynir the Braid

=52=  
Pg 299  
“Here’s Reynir the Braid”  
from [“Sir Robin the Brave”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mJCBAFzYY68)  
by J. Raposo & the Muppets

So now we’ve  
Met Reynir the Braid  
Though some still are  
Sorely afraid  
Trust Minna  
To see that  
They’ll meet up  
With DerpCat  
And no one  
Will snuff it  
(Those giants  
Can stuff it!)  
But friendship  
Will grow without aid  
Now that they’ve  
Found Reynir the Braid!

[Spoken]  
\--But he’s not immune.  
\--Yes, but neither is Tuuri  
*Not reassured*

[Sung]  
From stowaway  
To extra mouth  
It seems his trip  
Has headed south

From old sheep farm  
Into the world  
Was Reynir’s goal  
As it unfurled

To that fine end  
A ship he found  
And saw it was  
To Bornholm bound

Once out at sea  
He told the cook  
And then he faced  
Disaster!

The crew were not  
To go ashore  
Just dump their freight  
And nothing more

But then he heard  
“Unload two crates!”  
And took the chance  
To pass the gates

So was it  
That Reynir the Braid  
Himself for some  
Tuna did trade  
A pris’ner  
They took him  
Gave Mikkel  
A look-in  
While Lalli  
Was glaring  
And Sigrun  
Was swearing  
But Torbjörn  
Just could not be swayed  
They’re stuck with  
This Reynir the Braid!


	42. A Shipper’s Meme

=53=  
For Pg 299:

“A Shipper’s Meme”  
from [“What Is a Youth?”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zCQMlyXMRJE)  
by N Rota & E Walter

So here’s a youth  
With hair like fire  
And there’s a maid  
Though some will tire  
The ships sail on  
“Reyuuri” is  
Its fan nickname  
So go the ships  
Some truly are insane

If they share a look, a smile  
Shippers frenzy for a while  
Though it’s no more than that  
Lalli still acts the wary cat  
Mikkel is calm and steady  
Sigrun to ditch him is ready  
But Reynir is so tall

Emil looks on  
From his place of guard  
“Not prisoner”  
But he must still ward  
Sheepish this shepherd  
He knows he did wrong  
Now they must go and  
Drag him all along  
Sheepish this shepherd  
He knows he did wrong  
Now does end my song


	43. Ode to a Chapter Cover

=54=  
Pg 301  
“Ode to a Chapter Cover”  
from [“Beautiful Dreamer”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4U1l5y2rkzA)  
by Stephen Foster

Beautiful cover  
Images three  
What can their import  
For this chapter be?  
Let's take a closer  
Look at each one  
Trying to spot things  
Now isn't that fun?

First is an image  
Of warriors two  
Sigrun and Emil  
Both strolling away  
Into an urban  
Wasteland it's true  
But our two warriors  
Will carry the day

Next shows a fam'ly  
Mother and kits  
Crouching and hiding  
And using their wits  
From once a pet now  
Caniform Beast  
Always desirous  
To on a cat feast

Now to the final  
Image we go  
Last of the snippets  
That we can yet see  
Reynur in dreamland  
Fierce eyes below  
What can their import  
For this chapter be?  
What can their import  
For this chapter be?


	44. Lalli With the Moon in His Hands

=55=  
Filk attack!

Journal Entry 20  
“Lalli With the Moon in His Hands”  
from [“Elmo [Kiko] and the Lavender Moon”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhzh2LHPzOo)  
by Los Lobos

Lalli with the Moon in his hands  
Just sitting watching her  
As neat as you please

As he looks on  
A runo forms  
A plea for her  
To calm the storm

He sits and waits  
Still praying in his  
Runo of need

Lalli with the Moon in his hands  
Examining his silver prize  
Just like a cat

She shines at him  
As he looks on  
She seems to grin  
And he waits for dawn

Man and Moon  
As ageless as  
The glittering stars

She watches him  
As he scouts at night  
She protects him  
With her silver light

And as he runs  
She follows him  
Together they  
Will sink or swim

Lalli with the Moon in his hands  
Forgetful of the men  
Who walked her face

She shelter’d them oh  
So long ago  
And for their sake  
She heeds his plea

She keeps him safe  
Lalli with the Moon in his hands


	45. Dream Runner

=56=  
For pgs 271-273  
“Dream Runner”  
from [“Dream Lover”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wVHAQX5sSaU)  
by Bobby Darin

Usually I’m here to chat  
With my cousin, Fraidy-Cat  
But the last time I was here  
I saw a runner oh so clear  
And now I want  
(Yeah-yeah, yeah)  
To find  
(Yeah-yeah, yeah)  
This guy  
(Yeah-yeah, yeah)  
Who runs  
(Yeah-yeah, yeah)  
To find the Dream Runner  
To see what he has going on

Dream Runner, I’ll find you  
And you’ll tell me the truth  
What you’re doing way out here  
Because I know you’re somewhere near  
And now I want  
(Yeah-yeah, yeah)  
To find  
(Yeah-yeah, yeah)  
This guy  
(Yeah-yeah, yeah)  
Who runs  
(Yeah-yeah, yeah)  
To find the Dream Runner  
To see what he has going on

Seems he’s the bashful kind  
But he can’t hide from me  
I’ll see him in my mind  
And together we’ll be

Dream Runner come and chat  
We can sit down and chew the fat  
Maybe I can help you out  
So just give me a name to shout  
And now I want  
(Yeah-yeah, yeah)  
To find  
(Yeah-yeah, yeah)  
This guy  
(Yeah-yeah, yeah)  
Who runs  
(Yeah-yeah, yeah)  
To find the Dream Runner  
To see what he has going on

Dream Runner come and chat  
We can sit down and chew the fat  
Maybe I can help you out  
So just give me a name to shout  
And now I want  
(Yeah-yeah, yeah)  
To find  
(Yeah-yeah, yeah)  
This guy  
(Yeah-yeah, yeah)  
Who runs  
(Yeah-yeah, yeah)  
To find the Dream Runner  
To see what he has going on

I know something’s going on  
I’m gonna find out what’s going on  
Just tell me now what’s going on


	46. Alive in Kastrup

=57=  
Pg 302

“Alive in Kastrup”  
from [“One Night in Bangkok”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rgc_LRjlbTU)  
by Murray Head

Alive in Kastrup  
Means you’re rough and tumble  
Only the fastest  
Can survive this place  
Alive in Kastrup  
And she will not crumble  
Her kittens count on her  
To be the Ace  
Ev’ry day she stares  
Disaster in the face

Kastrup  
Copenhagen’s suburb  
And to live here is tough  
When it used to be superb  
For one momma cat  
And her kittens Moving  
Day has come for them  
As behooving

This cat’s  
Gonna keep her litter  
From becoming Grossling chow  
Like the birdies that twitter

It’s time  
One by one she brings them  
Out from their old place  
To a new spot they will soon come

(Spoken)  
Where Vaette  
Nor giants  
Nor beast nor troll  
Can find them

(Sung)  
Alive in Kastrup  
And she won’t give up now  
Life may be hard  
But it’s still good you see  
Alive in Kastrup  
And they won’t be troll chow  
In spite of danger  
Ev’rywhere she’ll see  
She will keep her kittens  
Safe while she is free

This place  
Demands all your focus  
If you’re going to  
Stay alive in this locus

Sometimes out   
By the shore  
Then deeper in the city  
There have been   
So many homes  
For this worried  
Momma kitty

(Spoken)  
Don’t interrupt!  
She’ll take each of her  
Little complainers down--

(Sung)  
To their  
New retreat  
Safe and away  
From their old routine  
Tut suite

And how!  
Both stealthily and swiftly  
She carries them  
With moves so nifty

(Spoken)  
No stupid beast  
Would dare to move  
In her groove

(Sung)  
Alive in Kastrup  
Means you’re rough and tumble  
Only the fastest  
Can survive this place  
Alive in Kastrup  
And she will not crumble  
Her kittens count on her  
To be the Ace  
Ev’ry day she stares  
Disaster in the face

Felines  
Ultimate survivors  
In this land that demands  
They’ll always be thrivers

(Spoken)  
And so far  
They’re still ahead of the game  
At least one step

(Sung)  
Those trolls are  
Too slow lately  
To match this gracious  
Feline lady

So far so good  
It’s all or nothing  
But it could all sink  
Because of one thing

(Spoken)  
It’ll take a few trips to  
Get all the kittens  
With the risk growing

(Sung)  
Alive in Kastrup  
And she won’t give up now  
Life may be hard  
But it’s still good you see  
Alive in Kastrup  
And they won’t be troll chow  
In spite of danger  
Ev’rywhere she’ll see  
She will keep her kittens  
Safe while she is free

Alive in Kastrup  
Means you’re rough and tumble  
Only the fastest  
Can survive this place  
Alive in Kastrup  
And she will not crumble  
Her kittens count on her  
To be the Ace  
Ev’ry day she stares  
Disaster in the face


	47. Let Them Squee

=58=  
Pg 304

"Let Them Squee"  
from ["Let It Be"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ih-8K1a_SsA)  
by the Beatles

When an update hits with images so  
Cute or sweet or cuddly  
The fans will all go nuts, let them squee  
The shippers get their goggles  
And the sound can be so deafening  
As they all go crazy, let them squee

Let them squee, let them squee  
Let them squee, let them squee  
As they all go crazy, let them squee

And when Minna lobs a hand grenade  
In the Disqus comment threads  
Well she's all but saying, let them squee  
And something so innocent  
Can bring them up into a frenzy  
As she's all but saying, let them squee

Let them squee, let them squee  
Let them squee, let them squee  
As she's all but saying, let them squee

Let them squee, let them squee  
Let them squee, let them squee  
As they all go crazy, let them squee

Let them squee, let them squee  
Let them squee, let them squee  
As they all go crazy, let them squee

The Lalli/Emil shippers  
And the ones that cry for Reyuuri  
Are still mostly harmless, let them squee  
And so all the Minnions cry out now  
At Dear Minna's imagery  
Since they're mostly harmless, let them squee

Let them squee, let them squee  
Let them squee, let them squee  
Since they're mostly harmless, let them squee

Let them squee, let them squee  
Let them squee, let them squee  
As they all go crazy, let them squee


	48. A Tuuri Lament

=59=  
Pg 305  
“A Tuuri Lament”  
from [“In My Life”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-eCh3y5VROM)  
by the Beatles

There are pages yet to transcribe  
And I hope I’m done before  
Emil’s finished bathing Lalli  
But I’d better not rip any more

So these pages keep their meaning  
A record of each Rash case they saw  
So Mikkel wants to have himself a copy  
But Sigrun thinks, “Read books? Pshaw!”

Now, she doesn’t hate book lovers  
Though it’s not what she would choose  
Telling Mikkel, “To each his own”  
But that attitude gives me the blues

For she knows not what she’s missing  
A million or more worlds in your hands  
I’d better stop and get back to transcribing  
This text saved from Silent Lands


	49. Cat-Boy

=60=  
Pg 305  
“Cat-Boy”  
from [“Hey, Jude”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_MjCqQoLLA)  
by the Beatles

Cat-Boy  
You hate these baths  
But you walk paths  
That get you filthy  
Don’t tell me  
It didn’t get  
On your skin  
(You’re really thin!)  
It got you filthy

Cat-Boy  
I know it’s cold  
For a scout bold  
Who’s still so tired  
This will pass  
And soon you’ll be  
Back in bed  
Resting your head  
You’re still so tired

But after all  
Your scouting round  
Cat-Boy, we’ve found  
That you’ll need a bath  
To get you all clean  
And don’t you fall  
A victim to  
Your pride, not you  
Don’t go down that path  
That way is so mean

Cat-Boy  
We’re almost done  
Feel the warm sun  
On your clean body  
It always  
Feels better  
After a soak  
Here’s a dry cloak  
For your clean body

All through the night  
You’ll scout it out  
Cat-Boy, no doubt  
Seeking out the ways  
In and out of there  
But with the light  
Comes your return  
Cat-Boy, you burn  
Sleeping through the days  
Without e’en one care

Cat-Boy  
You hate these baths  
But you walk paths  
That get you filthy  
Don’t tell me  
It didn’t get  
On your skin  
(You’re really thin!)  
It got you filthy

Meow  
Meow Meow  
Meow Meow Meow Purr  
Meow Meow Meow Purr  
Cat-Boy


	50. “Keep Your Mask On, Reynir”

=61=  
Pg 306  
“Keep Your Mask On, Reynir”  
from [“Save the Last Dance for Me”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QFoBreVWa7M)  
by the Drifters

You can talk  
In Icelandic talk on  
Or sing us a song  
We won’t silence you

You can try  
Ev’rything you know  
To help us to go  
On our quest it’s true

But don’t forget  
That we’re in a land  
That’s tainted by  
The Rash Disease  
So Reynir  
Keep your mask on now please

Oh I know  
That the mask pulls your hair  
Pain past compare  
But you need it on

And the mask  
May restrict your breath  
But it means death  
To not have it on

Cause don’t forget  
That we’re in a land  
That’s tainted by  
The Rash Disease  
So Reynir  
Keep your mask on now please

We know that you’re not Immune, Reynir  
So you need to wear your mask  
It will keep you safe while we are here  
We shouldn’t have to ask

You can talk  
Babble on and on  
Though we start to yawn  
We won’t shut you up

You can try  
To do useful things  
Pretend you’ve got wings  
We will let you fly

But don’t forget  
That we’re in a land  
That’s tainted by  
The Rash Disease  
So Reynir  
Keep your mask on now please

But don’t forget  
That we’re in a land  
That’s tainted by  
The Rash Disease  
So Reynir  
Keep your mask on now please

Keep your mask on now please

Keep your mask on now please


	51. “One Last F5”

=62=  
Pg 307

“One Last F5”  
from [“One Last Goodnight”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GvtlzPIYqmg)  
by Carol Burnett & Co.

One last F5  
For the night  
One last F5  
I hope you sleep tight  
No fears  
Just slumber so peaceful now  
You'll wake  
To a page that makes you wow...


	52. “Poor Doc Mikkel”

=63=  
Pg 308  
“Poor Doc Mikkel”  
from [“Old Doc Whoovey”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zf1UX-yXcHc)  
by T Geisel

Poor Doc Mikkel  
He’s stuck with these loons  
And the dear leader’s  
The biggest goon

So he said,  
“Reynir,  
Boy, now that you’re here  
Just go on to sleep and  
Let me handle Sigrun  
Just go on to sleep and  
Let me handle Sigrun.”

(Spoken)  
-He’ll handle who now?  
-He’ll handle Sigrun.  
-I sure hope so!

(Sung)  
Poor Doc Mikkel  
Where did his cookies go?  
It’s another black mark  
That he doesn’t show

When he saw poor Reynir  
He told him, “Come here  
We can’t have you wander  
All around to and fro  
We can’t have you wander  
All around to and fro.”

(Spoken)  
-Is Sigrun, ah, dangerous?  
-Nah, not unless you’re a troll!  
-If you say so...

(Sung)  
Poor Doc Mikkel  
Trying to maintain his calm  
After puppy-like Reynir  
Tuuri’s mien is a balm

If they did it his way  
It all would be OK  
“So go on to sleep now  
Just go on to sleep now  
Yes go on to sleep and  
Let me handle Sigrun”


	53. “Sparkle Once Again”

=64=  
Pg 309  
“Sparkle Once Again”  
from [“Crying in the Rain”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=caO4AO_g83E)  
by the Everly Brothers

Despite the rain and sleet  
And all the muddy water at my feet  
Yes, even though  
My hair gets battered so  
As I tremble and strain  
My hair will sparkle once again

They came back after that troll  
Went and puked on it as I went down the hall  
Blood teeth and drool  
Tried to wreak damage cruel  
But it all was in vain  
My hair did sparkle once again

Since I gave him that washing  
The cold shoulder has Lalli given me  
I hope it doesn’t last long  
For though I should be so strong  
I can’t help worry how it’s going to be

But soon we’ll be getting back  
Sigrun and I with loads of books in our sacks  
And no matter how  
Dirty my hair gets now  
My coiffure may complain  
My hair will sparkle once again

My hair will sparkle once again  
My hair will sparkle once again


	54. "The Building Is Blown"

=65=  
Pg 312, in response to corncobman's "Hello, My Baby" filk  
"The Building Is Blown"  
from [“The Michigan Rag”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2FMs_n9x4QE)  
by C. Jones

Go on tell them that the building is blown  
Come on tell them that the building is blown

Burn it down  
Or blow  
It up

Just pick  
All the kittens up

Roast, Toast, *Host* the building up  
Smoke, *choke*, broke the building up  
Go, throw, blow the building again  
Blow it again!


	55. “There is a Fawn in Danish Kastrup”

=66=  
Pg 315

IN MEMORIAM BEN E. KING

“There is a Fawn in Danish Kastrup”  
from [“Spanish Harlem”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k7F2sJjoJP8)  
by Ben E King & the Drifters

There is a fawn in Danish Kastrup  
A cute fawn up in Danish Kastrup  
It jumped into the room  
Hope that won’t be its tomb  
When normal updates on far-off Monday resume  
I’m sure that we will find out  
But so far Emil knows  
But there his rawness shows  
As so far he didn’t cry out

There are some cats in Danish Kastrup  
A few cats up in Danish Kastrup  
A schoolhouse is their home  
They’re still too young to roam  
Their mother brought them out of doom to where the tomes  
And DVDs are waiting  
She didn’t know the books  
Would draw humans to look  
After wading

(Musical Interlude)

She didn’t know the books  
Would draw humans to look  
After wading

La la la, la la la, la la la la  
(There is a fawn in Danish Kastrup)

La la la, la la la, la la la la  
(And there are cats in Danish Kastrup)


	56. “Deer Encounter”

=67=  
Pg 315

“Deer Encounter”  
from [“For What It’s Worth”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bjSpO2B6G4s)  
by Buffalo Springfield

We’re looting books in the clear  
Not supposed to be grosslings near  
Chilly rain pouring through the air  
But I think I heard something there

So I asked Sigrun,  
“Hey, can you hear that sound?  
Danger’s ev’rywhere in Kastrup Town.”

Then out of nowhere a fawn  
(Maybe it lived in this place all along?)  
Jumped through a window, this hind  
Looking just so scared that it blew my mind

Asked Sigrun,  
“Can you hear that sound?  
Danger’s ev’rywhere in Kastrup Town.”

What a weird way that we meet  
The non-Rashed fauna that’s so fleet  
If I could, I’d plant me some mines  
But that way, it’d ruin the hide

Asked Sigrun,  
“Can you hear that sound?  
Danger’s ev’rywhere in Kastrup Town.”

What we sow we shall reap  
These old world books in a heap  
This has been a really good raid  
But now with this fawn  
Its advent might ruin our day

Asked Sigrun,  
“Can you hear that sound?  
Danger’s ev’rywhere in Kastrup Town.”  
“Can you hear that sound?  
Danger’s ev’rywhere in Kastrup Town.”  
“Can you hear that sound?  
Danger’s ev’rywhere in Kastrup Town.”  
“Can you hear that sound?  
Danger’s ev’rywhere in Kastrup Town.”


	57. “Classroom Deer”

=68=  
Pg 316  
“Classroom Deer”  
from [“The Sweetheart Tree”](www.youtube.com/watch?v=cC65GEJpJQw)  
by J. Mercer & H. Mancini

So now  
There’s a deer  
In the classroom  
A deer  
That is likely  
Immune  
Sigrun didn’t hear  
The approaching deer  
But she grabbed  
Emil’s slung  
Carbine

She said,  
“It’s a deer,  
Not a beast, kid.  
The eyes  
Are a sure-fire sign.”  
So Emil relaxed  
His nerves a bit taxed  
And the deer  
Was a foe  
Nevermore


	58. “Reynir Meets the Skulldog”

=69=  
Pg 320  
“Reynir Meets the Skulldog”  
from [“Little Saint Nick”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aSynDh_K0EE)  
by the Beach Boys

Oooooooo  
Reynir just met Skulldog  
Dreams have come to our Reynir

Well way down south   
Where the trolls are bold  
Our Explorers met Reynir  
Took him in their fold  
While we wait for DerpCat  
He got put to bed  
Into the Dreamworld  
In a boat he was met

By a friendly Skulldog  
Friendly Skulldog  
By a friendly Skulldog  
Friendly Skulldog

Before his trip here  
He thought he didn’t dream  
But he changed his mind quickly  
When he saw the stream  
The Skulldog climbed aboard  
While he gawped at the view  
When he saw the Skulldog there  
He jumped out it’s true

From the friendly Skulldog  
Friendly Skulldog  
From the friendly Skulldog  
Friendly Skulldog

Run run Reynir  
Run run Reynir  
GYAAAA  
Run run Reynir  
Run run Reynir

He just fled the boat

And falling on the pond  
He found it held his weight  
And he ran away from there  
To meet his Fate  
Now Skulldog he just whimpered  
Cause his friend had just fled  
And next update we will see  
What he meets up ahead

Not a friendly Skulldog  
Friendly Skulldog  
Not a friendly Skulldog  
Friendly Skulldog

Oooooooo  
Reynir just met Skulldog  
Dreams have come to our Reynir

Oooooooo  
Reynir just met Skulldog  
Dreams have come to our Reynir

Oooooooo  
Reynir just met Skulldog  
Dreams have come to our Reynir


	59. “Dreamland Reynir”

=70=  
Pg 324  
“Dreamland Reynir”  
from [“Rock the Casbah”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bJ9r8LMU9bQ)  
by the Clash

So Mikkel wrapped up Reynir well  
And soon the boy was fast asleep  
He woke in a dreamland boat  
Where a Skulldog made him leap  
He ran across the waters fast  
So scared he just wanted to weep  
But he found some dry ground with  
A cute doggie and some sheep

He’s really excited  
Dreamland Reynir  
Dreamland Reynir  
He’s really excited  
Dreamland Reynir  
Dreamland Reynir

The doggie was a sweetheart  
And sheep are always sheep  
But Reynir didn’t count them  
He was already asleep  
But this pastoral scene brought out  
The sweet memories of home  
He called himself so stupid  
For his sad attempt to roam  
But even as a sheep  
Munched on his hair  
Reynir saw something

He’s really excited  
Dreamland Reynir  
Dreamland Reynir  
He’s really excited  
Dreamland Reynir  
Dreamland Reynir

He saw a Finnish woodland  
And a slight recumbent form  
Reynir leapt to join him  
With wonted greetings warm  
Reynir hopped across the water  
Into the Finnish scene  
With nary a thought  
Of what dangers could have been

Reynir found that it was boggy  
And that his boots began to sink  
But he kept on going anyway  
Didn’t stop to think

The Cat-Mage lay there quiet  
In his state of rest  
But then Reynir said, “Hey!”  
As he came into the nest

The Cat-Mage lay there quiet  
Lalli at peace  
Until Reynir came

He’s really excited  
Dreamland Reynir  
Dreamland Reynir  
He’s really excited  
Dreamland Reynir  
Dreamland Reynir

He’s really excited  
(He went up to Lalli)  
Dreamland Reynir  
Dreamland Reynir  
He’s really excited  
(But he may be in for a surprise)  
Dreamland Reynir  
Dreamland Reynir

He’s really excited  
(Our goofy little Reynir)  
Dreamland Reynir  
Dreamland Reynir  
He’s really excited  
Dreamland Reynir  
Dreamland Reynir


	60. “Cookie Trebuchets”

=71=  
Forum Exclusive--Linked on pg 325

With apologies to all those whom I missed (it’s only two verses, ya know?).

“Cookie Trebuchets”  
from [“Panzarmarsch”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fRuJJk2ev1k&t=2s)  
by Raubtier

Here they come  
The squirrel-crowd  
Confectioniferous  
To greet  
The newbies  
For ev’ry one of us

Now Dale has brought  
His goodies  
And the sentient dough  
As well  
All prepared to  
Challenge chessplayers  
While playing on the bells

So Windfighter and Blackjazz  
Ruby and LarsB  
Bring Troll House squirrel cookies  
In nice perspex jars see

While Ooo-La-La and Jesty  
Piney P_ and Sutremaine  
Prepare the sweet bombardment  
So let the cookies rain!

COOKIE TREBUCHETS  
All ready to fire  
Their sweet cannonade  
To all who may desire  
COOKIE TREBUCHETS  
Courtesy of Aprillen  
Ready for the day  
The newbies come again

Nuts  
Nuts  
We are nuts

Nuts  
Nuts  
We are nuts

Nuts  
Nuts  
We are nuts

Nuts  
Nuts  
We are nuts

Trebuchets  
Cannonade  
Batter-y  
Now we see

While Sunflower invites them  
To join in the Fan-Forum  
Not Me plays the drinking game  
With Everclear and Rum

The Mead-Moose made by Starfallz  
Joins the thronging welcome crowd  
The bringer of your fav’rite stuff  
With antlers standing proud

Then Mikko weaves a runo fair  
And corncobman makes jokes  
Our great Welcome Wagon  
Rolls out with all the folks

So all of us keep commenting  
Upon the daily page  
From all over the planet  
And all of diff’rent age

COOKIE TREBUCHETS  
All ready to fire  
Their sweet cannonade  
To all who may desire  
COOKIE TREBUCHETS  
Courtesy of Aprillen  
Ready for the day  
The newbies come again

COOKIE TREBUCHETS  
All ready to fire  
Their sweet cannonade  
To all who may desire  
COOKIE TREBUCHETS  
Courtesy of Aprillen  
Ready for the day  
The newbies come again

Trebuchets  
Mead Moose days  
Come and stay  
As we play!


	61. “Only it’s Onni”

=72=  
Pg 327  
“Only it’s Onni”  
from [“Only the Lonely”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2whGEvy13Ag)  
by Roy Orbison

There goes that  
Reynir again  
Across the  
Dreaming Sea  
Into another’s  
Dreamspace  
Only it’s Onni’s  
Only it’s Onni’s

Only the Onni  
Owns the dreamspace  
Reynir’s in  
Only it’s Onni  
So soon squeals  
Will begin

Onni is fearful  
Of ev’rything  
Reynir is cheerful  
And so we sing

But only the Onni  
Grows nigh  
And shies  
Only the Onni

There goes that  
Reynir again  
Across the  
Dreaming Sea  
Into another’s  
Dreamspace  
Only it’s Onni’s  
Only it’s Onni’s

Only the Onni  
Know the sad state  
That he’s in  
Only the Onni  
Knows he’ll cry  
And cry again

Maybe next update  
They’ll have a chat  
That would be great  
Let in the cat

And have him speak  
In the updates  
This week  
Only it’s Onni

There goes that  
Reynir again


	62. “Reynir’s Song”

=73=  
Pg 329  
“Reynir’s Song”  
from [“Bolero of Sorrow/So, You Are Going to Eat Me”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=61GFr8fVs6g)  
by Menchi & the Excel♥Girls

Can I be of help?  
Please do let me help  
Oh,  
I can’t help you with that  
I’m so dumb

Can I be your friend?  
I want to be friends  
Oops,  
I’m no good at friendship  
I’m so dumb

What kind of friend forgets to  
Comfort friends?  
I just can’t do anything right  
It seems

[After someone comforts him]

I’m glad we’re friends  
So glad we’re friends  
Now  
Let’s go share this dream  
‘Cause we’re team-mates


	63. “I Helped!”

=74=  
Pg 331  
“I Helped!”  
from [“On the Street Where You Live”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0udu4KYv1zI)  
by Lerner & Loewe

After Onni  
Heard from Lalli  
“Let me in!”  
The two talked  
Among themselves

I was getting  
A bit nervous  
For these Finns  
Are so stoic  
That they might  
As well be elves

Then I started  
To my shock  
To disappear  
But though I am  
Fading I know  
Just what I hear

Before when I strove  
To help people out  
What I did just drove  
Those I would aid   
To scream and shout  
But now Tuuri’s bro  
Tells me as I go  
That it’s true  
Just this once  
That I helped

When I heard those words  
Lo my heart did bound  
And it seemed that birds  
Burst into song  
From all around  
Words I can’t ignore  
Never heard before  
Yes it’s true  
Just this once  
That I helped

And oh  
The wonderful feeling  
Now I know  
That I’ve been of aid  
I’ll throw  
My arms up and squealing  
Rejoice at Onni’s  
Statement as I  
Leave the glade

That I disappear  
Doesn’t bother me  
Cause I heard it clear  
From Onni’s lips  
That lauded me  
I can go in peace  
Knowing this at least  
That it’s true  
Just this once  
That I helped

[Interlude]

That I disappear  
Doesn’t bother me  
Cause I heard it clear  
From Onni’s lips  
That lauded me  
I can go in peace  
Knowing this at least  
That it’s true  
Just this once  
That I helped


	64. “Here in My Haven”

=75=  
Pg 334  
“Here in My Haven”  
from [“Hushabye Mountain”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y18AzhWRc14)  
by RB & RM Sherman

It’s good to see  
You here in my haven  
My young cousin  
Lalli the Mage  
And now that you  
Can’t go back with your friend  
Stay here with me  
And talk with your sage

Don’t try to roam  
From your little haven  
In this world  
Of infinite seas  
That Thing we know  
Is trying to find us  
Better by far  
You stay here with me

So let’s relax  
Right here in my haven  
Just enjoy  
This time spent with me  
Have you made friends?  
So, maybe you’ve made one  
Par for the course  
For Cousin Lalli


	65. “Finnish Mage”

=76=  
Pg 334  
“Finnish Mage”  
from [“Penny Lane”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-rB0pHI9fU)  
by the Beatles

The Finnish Mage was all upset about the wash I gave  
And he denied the fist-bump that next I tried  
So off I went at our Sigrun’s side  
Turbulent the ride

I’m not sure if he’s forgiven me for “Big Ka-THUM”  
I’m pretty sure he doesn’t trust that Reynir guy  
Maybe he’ll get calmer by and by  
Wouldn’t bet on it, not one bit

Finnish Mage is in my thoughts and on my mind  
Even more than this downpour I find  
And as the rain comes down

The Finnish Mage goes out each night to scout intensively  
I’m always worried that next time he won’t come back  
What if a nest of trolls formed a pack  
And the pack attacked?

Finnish Mage is in my thoughts and on my mind  
Too bad he had to stay behind  
For slumber called to him

I hope his dreams are happy and he’s rested when we’re back  
So we can go out on another quickie raid  
And gather up more books that make the grade  
Then we’ll have it made

The Finnish Mage I hope will not eschew my company  
I really want for him to see me as a friend  
Before our mission is at end  
And we all part ways but these days

Finnish Mage is in my thoughts and on my mind  
Even more than this downpour I find  
And as the rain comes down  
Finnish Mage is in my thoughts and on my mind  
Even more than this downpour I find  
Finnish Mage


	66. “The Coming of DerpKitty”

=77=  
Pg 335  
“The Coming of DerpKitty”  
from [“Milo’s Song”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vMVyA4YfZYo)  
by N Gimbel & L Pockriss

How will they find DerpKitty?  
How will it come to be?  
Will it be so sad  
Or a comedy?

Will our Emil toast the place  
Getting Sigrun in his face  
Or will the dog-beast  
Be about to chow down?

How will they find DerpKitty?  
How will they find the cat?  
Just how Minna wants  
And that’s really that

It could be a cliffhanger  
Or Cthulhund going “Grrrr”  
The way’s really up to her  
Our Dear Creator

We’ll see DerpKitty soon  
And the fandom will squee  
At the advent of DerpKitty

DerpKitty’s coming soon  
You’ll be coming soon Kitty  
You’ll be coming soon

[Musical Interlude]

How will they find DerpKitty?  
How will they find the cat?  
Just how Minna wants  
And that’s really that

It could be a cliffhanger  
Or Cthulhund going “Grrrr”  
The way’s really up to her  
Our Dear Creator


	67. “Emil, the Swedish Cleanser”

=78=  
Pg 335  
“Emil, the Swedish Cleanser”  
from [“Lambert, the Sheepish Lion”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VoMmIPpNhAc)  
by J Dubin

Emil  
You don’t know your tongues  
You don’t know your math  
You met the two Finns  
When needing a bath

Emil  
Your ego’s too big  
Your knowledge too small  
Your clumsiness leads  
To your pratfalls

Emil  
The Swedish Cleanser  
Emil  
Ka-THUM Dispenser  
He wants to be a Cleanser bold  
Emil  
The Swedish Cleanser

Pouring rain came down as he  
And Sigrun probed the school  
Sigrun found some DVDs  
Which Emil thought so cool

Then he heard a herd of wilding deer  
And watched them passing by  
(Jump, jump, jump, jump)  
But Sigrun said, “I’m sorry, kid”  
As she saw dinner fly

Emil  
The Swedish Cleanser  
Emil  
Ka-THUM Dispenser  
He wants to be a Cleanser bold  
Emil  
The Swedish Cleanser

As they packed up the books they’d found  
Emil heard something new  
He told Sigrun and she told him  
Exactly what to do

When Emil froze, she gave him a push  
And said, “Don’t wimp out now!”  
So off he went to try to find  
The source of the “Mrow”


	68. “The Emil on the Prowl”

=79=  
Pg 336  
“The Emil on the Prowl”  
from [“The Farmer in the Dell”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ilE3RxeBck)  
(Traditional)

The Emil on the prowl  
The Emil on the prowl  
Hi-ho the dairy-oh  
The Emil on the prowl

The cats made some noise  
The cats made some noise  
Hi-ho the dairy-oh  
The cats made some noise

So Emil goes on  
So Emil goes on  
Hi-ho the dairy-oh  
So Emil goes on

The Beast is a-hunt  
The Beast is a-hunt  
Hi-ho the dairy-oh  
The Beast is a-hunt

Now Emil must act  
Now Emil must act  
Hi-ho the dairy-oh  
Now Emil must act


	69. “Minna’s Minnions”

=80=  
Pg 337  
“Minna’s Minnions”  
from [“Mickey’s Monkey”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jpLVyZVRw3w)  
by Smokey Robinson and the Miracles

Two months and Book One will be ready!  
Let’s sing ‘bout who we are  
Re-read it through, a read through

Read Stand Still Stay Si-i-i-lent  
(Read Stand Still Stay Si-i-i-lent)  
Read A Redtail’s Dream  
(Read A Redtail’s Dream)  
F5 ev’ry night

So this gal named Minna came from Finland’s cool  
She was making landscapes made us drool  
Put up the best comics on her website  
So we F5 like mad ev’ry night

And across the internet went Minna’s Language Tree  
(Read Stand Still Stay Si-i-i-lent)  
And ComicMix’s tournament was key  
(Read A Redtail’s Dream)  
And by then we all agreed  
(Read Stand Still Stay Si-i-i-lent)  
That Minna’s Minnions were what we want to be  
(Read A Redtail’s Dream)

And now we’re all Minna’s willing Minnions  
(We’re all Minna’s willing Minnions)  
We’re all Minna’s willing Minnions  
(We’re all Minna’s willing Minnions)

Read Stand Still Stay Silent  
(Read Stand Still Stay Silent)  
Read A Redtail’s Dream  
(Read A Redtail’s Dream)

Read Stand Still Stay Silent  
(Read Stand Still Stay Silent)  
Read A Redtail’s Dream  
(Read A Redtail’s Dream)

Minnions firm, Minnions true  
(Read Stand Still Stay Silent)  
Anyone can be a Minnion too  
(Read A Redtail’s Dream)  
And now we’re all Minna’s willing Minnions  
(We’re all Minna’s willing Minnions)  
We’re all Minna’s willing Minnions  
(We’re all Minna’s willing Minnions)

Read Stand Still Stay Si-i-i-lent  
(Read Stand Still Stay Si-i-i-lent)  
Read Stand Still Stay Si-i-i-lent  
(Read Stand Still Stay Si-i-i-lent)

We’re the Minnions  
(We’re the Minnions)  
Minna’s Minnions  
(Minna’s Minnions)

We’re the Minnions  
(We’re the Minnions)  
Minna’s Minnions  
(Minna’s Minnions)

Minna’s Minnions  
(Minna’s Minnions)  
Minna’s Minnions  
(Minna’s Minnions)

Hit F5

Read Stand Still Stay Si-i-i-lent  
(Read Stand Still Stay Si-i-i-lent)  
Read A Redtail’s Dream  
(Read A Redtail’s Dream)

F5  
F5, F5


	70. “Draw”

=81=  
Pg 340  
“Draw”  
from [“Sing”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3WRLtTOatmU)  
by J Raposo

Draw  
Draw a dog  
Draw its snarl  
Through the fog

Draw the transformation  
Hear the screams once you’re done

Draw  
Draw a THING  
Draw the horrors  
And let the screaming ring

Have multiple rib-cage tentacles  
Sprout out from the doggy’s back

And draw  
Draw the dog

(AUGH GET IT AWAY)  
(OH PLEASE GET IT AWAY)  
(LET’S RUN IT’S COMING FOR US)

(AUGH GET IT AWAY)  
(OH PLEASE GET IT AWAY)  
(LET’S RUN IT’S COMING FOR US)

Draw  
Draw a THING  
See the fear  
That it brings

Paint it in great detail  
Make all its viewers quail

Draw  
Draw a THING  
Draw the horrors  
And let the screaming ring

Have multiple rib-cage tentacles  
Sprout out from the doggy’s back

And draw  
Draw the dog

(AUGH GET IT AWAY)  
(OH PLEASE GET IT AWAY)  
(LET’S RUN IT’S COMING FOR US)

(AUGH GET IT AWAY)  
(OH PLEASE GET IT AWAY)  
(LET’S RUN IT’S COMING FOR US)

So draw  
Draw the dog


	71. “Kill the Beast”

=82=  
Pg 340  
“Kill the Beast”  
from [“The Mob Song”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rh98Kscctw4)  
by A Menken & H Ashman

I was trying to be kind  
Shoot it right in its poor head  
But it moved and so I missed it  
Otherwise it would be dead  
Now it’s crippled so it’s changing  
Into sheer monstrosity  
And at last it stands there undisguised  
A horror plain to see

Shot the dog  
Missed the head  
And apologized profusely  
But I saw some of my bullets mark its hide

Now reload  
There it goes  
Ripping off the guise of doggie  
And there’s something truly terrible inside

It’s a beast  
An offense  
Against Nature  
Naked skull  
Nothing dull about this

Tentacles  
Spider legs  
Like something from the dregs  
Make it dead  
Good and dead!  
Kill the Beast!

Lock and load  
Here we go  
Send another spray of bullets out  
There’s nothing else but to kill or be killed  
Now it’s done  
Here it comes  
Anytime now it’ll charge me  
But I’ll make sure that it’s not my blood that’s spilled

It’s a beast  
Out of all  
Your worst nightmares  
Nothing less  
And prepared for the feast

Take your gun  
Aim it true  
It’s no fun  
Up to you  
Pull that trigger nice and slow

If I’d just  
Let it be  
It would still try to pursue us  
Sigrun wants nothing to follow us at least  
I’ve a gun  
And a knife  
Though it tries to take my life  
But after all these tears and strife  
I’ll kill the Beast!

Heart in throat  
Forward bolt  
‘Cause it’s coming to a battle  
When it’s over one of two lives will have ceased  
Must be strong  
Won’t be long  
Like the heroes of old song  
The Cleanser up against what’s Wrong  
I’ll kill the Beast!


	72. “Cry of Cthulhund”

=83=  
Pg 344  
“Cry of Cthulhund”  
from [“Faust (Winslow)”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=97vV_cB8GkE)  
by Paul Williams

I am not myself these days  
In a million ways  
But I cannot seem to stop it  
It began oh so long ago  
Felt the sickness grow  
And I never got atop it

But now I gain control  
And pull back from the role  
Of Monster  
Out a-ravaging  
Back to faithful hound  
Hereafter  
Not Monster  
And an enemy  
The Rash permits me while in

Beams of bright sunshine  
Beams that make it end  
Beams in which I whine  
Beams I love again

I am not myself these days  
Living in a haze  
But I used to be a good dog  
Now a madness has hold of me  
What else could it be?  
Filling all my mind with thick fog

But now I gain control  
And pull back from the role  
Of Monster  
Out a-ravaging  
Back to faithful hound  
Hereafter  
Not Monster  
And an enemy  
Rash permits me while in

Beams of bright sunshine  
Beams that make it end  
Beams in which I whine  
Beams I love again

All the clouds have gone  
How could it be?  
And being me is mighty fine  
I’ll bear any cost  
Just to be me  
Transitory  
Though it proves to be  
Like beams  
Beams that make it end  
Proves to be  
Like beams  
Beams I love again


	73. “Journey’s End/Stand Still. Stay Silent”

=84=  
Pg 345  
“Journey’s End/Stand Still. Stay Silent”  
from [“Melodies of Life/FINAL FANTASY”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ckcjs-2yWDk)  
by Nobuo Uematsu

Alone in the Dark  
Of the hostile Silent World  
Six people strive just to survive  
That in which they’ve been hurled  
‘Til at long last they find  
The way on which they wend  
Leads them all back home  
To Journey’s End

To Silent Denmark  
Went our brave explorers six  
Five from a small expedition  
And one tossed in the mix  
But onward they went to  
The Cities of the Trolls  
Slow but sure  
Onward  
The Cat-Tank rolls

Though the bridge collapsed behind  
It didn’t damp their frame of mind  
Finding books  
And fighting monsters  
Would be fun  
For awhile

The voyagers six  
In the Silent World  
Looking for the road to  
Their Journey’s End  
Someday they’ll find  
Journey’s End  
Though their Journey’s End  
Leads them through the dark and  
Silent World  
They’ll find their way somehow

[Musical Interlude]

So far yet so near  
Onni dreams of family  
Reynir helped their meeting  
Though annoying poor Lalli  
But though the Silent World  
Is drawn up against them  
They will meet  
In the flesh  
At Journey’s End

Though there’s something after them  
These stolid Hotakainen men  
Won’t give up  
And with the rest  
Lalli  
Will overcome

The voyagers six  
In the Silent World  
Looking for the road to  
Their Journey’s End  
Someday they’ll find  
Journey’s End  
Though their Journey’s End  
Leads them through the dark and  
Silent World  
They’ll find their way  
And once the six leave  
The Silent World behind  
Their cargo will help uplift  
Humanity  
Perhaps a cure  
For the Rash  
Once at Journey’s End  
Our six at heart will never be apart  
Though not always together

[Musical Interlude]

Hearken to the tale  
Minna calls  
Stand Still Stay Silent  
Hearken to the tale  
Of our heroes  
Facing Giants

Hearken to the tale  
Bend your ears   
To hear the story  
Hearken to the tale  
Of good friends  
And deeds of glory

So it was  
That six motley misfits  
Came together  
And became our heroes  
Through it all

Yes it was  
That six motley misfits  
Broke the Silence  
And returned  
Without a loss  
Back  
To Journey’s End!  
(Hearken to the tale  
Listen)  
(Hearken to the tale  
Journey’s)  
END!


	74. “The Death of MomCat”

=85=  
Pg 354  
“The Death of MomCat”  
from [“Bus Stop”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZEoKqjfvkw)  
by the Hollies

CatTank  
Wet day  
Momma Cat lay  
Wounded on the desktop  
Mikkel  
Calms her  
Softly warms her  
Wounded on the desktop  
Set the syringe  
“Will it help her?”  
“Yes”, and then, “There, there”  
Sigrun grumps out  
Mikkel tells her  
“You made her ending fair”

Mamma Kitty   
Hissed as Mikkel  
Gently gave the shot  
What Emil thought  
Would heal her  
Eased her on her way  
DerpKitten lay there  
Unknowing Mamma was no more  
Though Emil shared  
Some tuna she  
Was feeling bored

As he saw  
How Momma Cat lay  
Dying on the desk  
Mikkel did  
The only thing  
To ease her into rest  
Set face as   
He gently did it  
Comfort her as she goes  
Quickly with that  
Big injection  
Bring it to a close

[Instrumental interlude]

Mamma Kitty   
Hissed as Mikkel  
Gently gave the shot  
What Emil thought  
Would heal her  
Eased her on her way  
DerpKitten lay there  
Unknowing Mamma was no more  
Though Emil shared  
Some tuna she  
Was feeling bored

CatTank  
Wet day  
Momma Cat lay  
Wounded on the desktop  
Mikkel  
Calms her  
Softly warms her  
Wounded on the desktop  
Set the syringe  
“Will it help her?”  
“Yes”, and then, “There, there”  
Sigrun grumps out  
Mikkel tells her  
“You made her ending fair”


	75. “Lonely Lalli”

=86=  
Pg 364  
“Lonely Lalli”  
from [“Unchained Melody”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qiiyq2xrSI0)  
by the Righteous Brothers

All alone  
Out scouting  
But what’s this that I feel?  
My first  
Lonely time

The snow falls soft  
Through forest  
And Rash-begotten pods  
Along  
Their vines

I miss... someone  
I miss... someone  
I’d like some company

Normally I go  
Lone and silently  
Normally alone  
Silently

But today I want  
Friends with me  
Even he  
But today I want  
Friends with me

All alone  
Out scouting  
But what’s this  
What’s this that I feel?  
My first  
Lonely time

The snow falls soft  
Through forest  
And Rash-begotten pods  
Along  
Their vines

I miss... someone  
I miss... someone  
I’d like some company


	76. The Little Filker

=87=  
Pg 364  
[To "The Itsy-Bitsy Spider"]  
There was a little filker  
A ref'rence web it wove  
In came the comments  
A ref'rence treasure trove  
One fan got trapped and  
Struggled but in vain  
And the filker crept up close to  
Weave a filk again


	77. “That Porridge Smells Good”

=88=  
Pg 369  
“That Porridge Smells Good”  
from [“The Banana Boat Song”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGuYoRWbgt8)  
by Harry Belafonte

Hey  
Hey-y-y snow  
Porridge warm make ye drop da bones  
Hey  
Issa deep  
Issa deep  
Issa deep  
Issa deep  
Issa de-e-ep snow  
Porridge warm make ye drop da bones

Scout all night through de wet an’ cold  
(Porridge warm make ye drop da bones)  
Trudgin’ back ‘fore the day takes hold  
(Porridge warm make ye drop da bones)

Now I de alley-man autopsy Cthulhund  
(Porridge warm make ye drop da bones)  
Now I de alley-man autopsy Cthulhund  
(Porridge warm make ye drop da bones)

Oh ribs and forelegs and teeth and skull  
(Porridge warm make ye drop da bones)  
Placed in order so mystical  
(Porridge warm make ye drop da bones)

Hey  
Issa de-e-ep snow  
Porridge warm make ye drop da bones  
Hey  
Issa deep  
Issa deep  
Issa deep  
Issa deep  
Issa de-e-ep snow  
Porridge warm make ye drop da bones

A really good dog was poor Cthulhund  
(Porridge warm make ye drop da bones)  
Though de Rash made it seek to wound  
(Porridge warm make ye drop da bones)

Oh ribs and forelegs and teeth and skull  
(Porridge warm make ye drop da bones)  
Placed in order so mystical  
(Porridge warm make ye drop da bones)

Hey  
Issa de-e-ep snow  
Porridge warm make ye drop da bones  
Hey  
Issa deep  
Issa deep  
Issa deep  
Issa deep  
Issa de-e-ep snow  
Porridge warm make ye drop da bones

Now I de alley-man autopsy Cthulhund  
(Porridge warm make ye drop da bones)  
Now I de alley-man autopsy Cthulhund  
(Porridge warm make ye drop da bones)

Hey snow  
Hey-y-y snow  
Porridge warm make ye drop da bones  
Hey  
Issa deep  
Issa deep  
Issa deep  
Issa deep  
Issa de-e-ep snow  
Porridge warm make ye drop da bones


	78. “(Loot) Copenhagen”

=89=  
Pg 375  
“(Loot) Copenhagen”  
from [“Rockin’ Robin”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LklFP1IG9KY)  
by Bobby Day

The map shows the center  
Of the old town  
Marked up with the route they’re gonna  
Use to get ‘round  
Now they’re headed for  
Ørstedsparken  
So the hard-core lootin’ can  
Now begin!

Copenhagen  
(Loot Loot Loot)  
Loot, loot Copenhagen  
(Loot)  
(Loot all the books)  
Loot Copenhagen  
Gettin’ ev’ry book that comes in sight  
(Loot)  
(Loot all the books)

Drivin’ up the main drag  
Past the Tivoli  
Movin’ to the heart of the  
Indre By  
But first we traverse  
The Knippelsbro  
Cat-Tank runnin’ hard, drivin’  
Through the snow

Copenhagen  
(Loot Loot Loot)  
Loot, loot Copenhagen  
(Loot)  
(Loot all the books)  
Loot Copenhagen  
Gettin’ ev’ry book that comes in sight  
(Loot)  
(Loot all the books)

Jumpin’ and a-joltin’  
Lalli just can’t stand  
Clutchin’ Emil’s jacket coat  
With one thin hand  
Asleep while Tuuri chatters  
And Reynir freaks  
And Mikkel gets in one of his  
Trademark tweaks

The map shows the center  
Of the old town  
Marked up with the route they’re gonna  
Use to get ‘round  
Now they’re headed for  
Ørstedsparken  
So the hard-core lootin’ can  
Now begin!

Copenhagen  
(Loot Loot Loot)  
Loot, loot Copenhagen  
(Loot)  
(Loot all the books)  
Loot Copenhagen  
Gettin’ ev’ry book that comes in sight  
(Loot)  
(Loot all the books)

Jumpin’ and a-joltin’  
Lalli just can’t stand  
Clutchin’ Emil’s jacket coat  
With one thin hand  
Asleep while Tuuri chatters  
And Reynir freaks  
And Mikkel gets in one of his  
Trademark tweaks

The map shows the center  
Of the old town  
Marked up with the route they’re gonna  
Use to get ‘round  
Now they’re headed for  
Ørstedsparken  
So the hard-core lootin’ can  
Now begin!

Copenhagen  
(Loot Loot Loot)  
Loot, loot Copenhagen  
(Loot)  
(Loot all the books)  
Loot Copenhagen  
Gettin’ ev’ry book that comes in sight  
(Loot)  
(Loot all the books)

(Gonna grab all o’ the books)  
(Grabbin’ up all o’ the books)  
(Gonna grab all o’ the books)  
(Grabbin’ up all o’ the books)  
(Gonna grab all o’ the books)  
(Grabbin’ up all o’ the books)  
(Loot)  
(Books)  
(Loot Books)


	79. "Driving Through the Wreck of Olden Days"

=90=  
Pg 379  
"Driving Through the Wreck of Olden Days"  
from [“Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Z8bBQmbXRk)  
by A. Lloyd Webber

Once this was a mighty kingdom  
Back before the Illness  
Now it lies dark and forgotten  
Mould'ring in the stillness  
Driving through the wreck of Olden Days  
Trying to see through the snow  
Fighting to stay  
On the right way  
To get where we must go

Driving past abandoned monuments  
Wond'ring who these people were  
So long ago  
Curse this thick snow  
Making me wish for fur  
Palace grand and famous gardens  
Ancient Danish birthright  
Copenhagen, Jewel of Denmark  
Target for the good fight

But when they tried  
Too many died  
Leaving them just to mourn  
Driving through the wreck of Olden Days  
Now abandoned and forlorn  
Yet in this night  
We'll shine a light  
The veil of Silence torn  
Boldly going where no one dare go  
Cloaked by winter and shielded by snow  
Off to find more books  
Off to find more books


	80. “Through the Ruined City”

=91=  
Pg 392  
“Through the Ruined City”  
from [“Eleanor Rigby”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HuS5NuXRb5Y)  
by the Beatles

Oh, running through the ruined city  
Oh, running through the ruined city

Determined Lalli  
Runs through the snow  
And the cold  
In the dregs of the day  
Finding a way

All of the dead ends  
Pushing him on  
Past the wrecks  
That are blocking the streets  
Boy, is he fleet

Through the ruined city  
The scout will find a way  
Through the ruined city  
Though it takes him all day

Reluctant Tuuri  
Follows the path  
That he marked  
To a dark alleyway  
What can she say?

She’d rather go back  
But Sigrun says  
An attack  
Comes with ev’ry retreat  
Like a defeat

Through the ruined city  
The scout will find a way  
Through the ruined city  
Though it takes him all day

Oh, running through the ruined city  
Oh, running through the ruined city

Determined Lalli  
Blocked at each turn  
But he can’t  
Just give up and have done  
So on he runs

He doesn’t fail, see  
Not since his youth  
And a “yes”  
That got four people killed  
He wasn’t thrilled

Through the ruined city  
(Oh, running through the ruined city)  
The scout will find a way  
Through the ruined city  
(Oh, running through the ruined city)  
Though it takes him all day


	81. “Invoking Luonto”

=92=  
Pg 396  
“Invoking Luonto”  
from [“Phantom’s Theme (Beauty and the Beast)”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KwCryq5qtyk)  
by Paul Williams

Half asleep I make a choice  
For the sake of those behind  
For no other way can I see  
I cannot fail this path to find

To work it out I call him in  
My companion spirit closer than a friend  
My one steadfast, sturdy guardian  
Never wavering in fierceness or in power  
Come and aid me in this hour

Invocations now I cast  
My Luonto calling in  
Companion of my darkest heart  
A spirit mightier than men

To work it out I call him in  
My companion spirit closer than a friend  
My one steadfast, sturdy guardian  
Never wavering in fierceness or in power  
Come and aid me in this hour

A Tale of Lalli and the Lynx  
My companion true  
The singer of my spell-craft  
Normally silent as the sphinx  
I’ve been down the road  
And I’ve seen its turnings  
Seen my weapons burning  
Down to their hafts

Through this building we’ll parade  
For no other way I see  
So I must test this meat-pod crowd  
But it is surely beyond me

To work it out I call him in  
My companion spirit closer than a friend  
My one steadfast, sturdy guardian  
Never wavering in fierceness or in power  
Come and aid me in this hour


	82. “What Next?”

=93=  
Pg 400  
“What Next?”  
from [“My Favorite Things”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0IagRZBvLtw)  
by R. Rogers & O. Hammerstein

Four Hundred pages of this latest venture  
Four Hundred pages of laughs & adventure  
Four Hundred pages of Authorial Text  
Yet we still rush to see what will come next!

Four Hundred pages of landscapes so luscious  
Four Hundred pages of friendships so precious  
Four Hundred pages all neatly indexed  
Yet we still rush to see what will come next!

Four Hundred pages of weekday cliffhangers  
Four Hundred pages of dreams, hopes, and angers  
Four Hundred pages that no one rejects  
Yet we still rush to see what will come next!

Though the Rash hits  
Through the sad bits  
Through the troll attacks  
We clamor and rave to see what will come next  
So Minna can just relax!

Four Hundred pages of this latest venture  
Four Hundred pages of laughs & adventure  
Four Hundred pages of Authorial Text  
Yet we still rush to see what will come next!

Four Hundred pages of landscapes so luscious  
Four Hundred pages of friendships so precious  
Four Hundred pages all neatly indexed  
Yet we still rush to see what will come next!

Four Hundred pages of weekday cliffhangers  
Four Hundred pages of dreams, hopes, and angers  
Four Hundred pages that no one rejects  
Yet we still rush to see what will come next!

Though the Rash hits  
Through the sad bits  
Through the troll attacks  
We clamor and rave to see what will come next  
So Minna can just relax!


	83. “Warm Jacket Mine”

=94=  
Forum Exclusive  
Inspired by Windfighter’s [“A Confession of Love”](https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11568370/1/A-confession-of-Love)

“Warm Jacket Mine”  
from [“Sweet Caroline”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2w-_Vtttrfc)  
by Neil Diamond

Where to begin?  
How should I start this letter?  
I know I’d better write this down

At first I ran  
But I can run no longer  
Now it’s all done I long for you

Hands  
Clutching hands  
Reaching out  
Keeping you  
Close to me

Warm jacket mine  
Well you warm me to the bone

And now I find  
I need you and you alone

Though  
I  
Know

You’re really his  
But I can’t bear to yield you  
Now that I feel you close to me

And so I rest  
Knowing I need you only  
More than poor Emil’s need could be

Warm  
Now I’m warm  
Reaching out  
Keeping you  
Close to me

Warm jacket mine  
Well you warm me to the bone

And now I find  
I need you and you alone

Warm jacket mine  
Well you warm me to the bone

And now I find  
I need you and you alone

Warm jacket mine


	84. “Tuuri’s Song (Through the Silent World)”

=95=  
Pg 414  
“Tuuri’s Song (Through the Silent World)”  
from [“Fly Me to the Moon (In Other Words)”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oCW9Hey6IVY)  
by Frank Sinatra

Through the Silent World  
We have come and we go on  
And I love it though I know I’m  
Clueless as a fawn

Because I was  
Through with home  
Because I was  
Born to roam

On and on we go  
Exploring through the winter cold  
Searching for old books for they’re more  
Valuable than gold

And so it goes  
Roaming on  
And so it goes  
With each dawn

[Musical Interlude]

On and on we go  
Exploring through the winter cold  
Searching for old books for they’re more  
Valuable than gold

And so it goes  
Roaming on  
And so it goes  
With each dawn


	85. “The Note”

=96=  
Pg 418  
“The Note”  
from [“I Don’t Want to Live on the Moon”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kIq8jLj5TzU)  
by J. Moss

Now if any of you wake up  
Rest assured that we mean to come back  
But we soon will run out of food  
So we need to go look for some snacks

As the Kastellet troops all  
Abandon their cause  
We find we must go further  
Though it gives us pause

So although we may wander  
For one afternoon  
We’ll surely be back very soon

Now don’t you think we left you for dead  
If you wake and you find us still gone  
Just stay safely tucked in your beds  
And we promise, we haven’t moved on

As the Kastellet troops all  
Abandon their cause  
We find we must go further  
Though it gives us pause

So although we may roam  
Far from home through the tombs  
Yes, we’ll surely be back very soon

We left you sleeping so sweetly  
But if you should awake  
Don’t get all worried  
We know what’s at stake

We’re just trying to suss out  
A num-num or two  
We’ll be back as soon as we’re through

And just as soon as we get some food  
We’ll be back double-quick, don’t despair!  
We will not give up on you now  
Very soon we’ll be coming back there

As the Kastellet troops all  
Abandon their cause  
We find we must go further  
Though it gives us pause

So although we may stay  
Out for one afternoon  
Don’t give up!  
We’ll be back  
To you soon

Don’t give up!  
We’ll be back  
To you soon


	86. “Dream Dog”

=97=  
Pg 432  
“Dream Dog”  
from [“Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qeMFqkcPYcg)  
by the Eurythmics

Lead on Icelandic Spitz  
Who am I to disagree?  
But do you know  
Where you’re taking me?  
‘Cause you know I’m  
Looking for someone

Not the direction I want  
But the direction that you go  
But since you live here it’s okay  
As long as it’s a place I know

Baaaaaaaaaaaamf  
Ow, my nose hurts!

Lead on Icelandic Spitz  
Who am I to disagree?  
But do you know  
Where you’re taking me?  
‘Cause you know I’m  
Looking for someone

Baaaaaaaaaaaamf  
Ow, my nose hurts!

That’s our Cat-Tank  
What’s our Cat-tank  
Doing here

That’s our Cat-Tank  
Sitting here  
What’s our Cat-tank  
Doing here

That’s our Cat-Tank  
Sitting here  
What’s our Cat-tank  
Doing here

That’s our Cat-Tank  
Sitting here  
What’s our Cat-tank  
Doing here

Not the direction I want  
But the direction that you go  
But since you live here it’s okay  
As long as it’s a place I know

Baaaaaaaaaaaamf  
Ow, my nose hurts!

Lead on Icelandic Spitz  
Who am I to disagree?  
But do you know  
Where you’re taking me?  
‘Cause you know I’m  
Looking for someone

Lead on Icelandic Spitz  
Who am I to disagree?  
But do you know  
Where you’re taking me?  
‘Cause you know I’m  
Looking for someone

Lead on Icelandic Spitz  
Who am I to disagree?  
But do you know  
Where you’re taking me?  
‘Cause you know I’m  
Looking for someone

Lead on Icelandic Spitz  
Who am I to disagree?  
But do you know  
Where you’re taking me?  
‘Cause you know I’m  
Looking for someone


	87. “Dream Reynir”

=98=  
Pg 433  
“Dream Reynir”  
from [“Dream On”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Wzic15m7YQ)  
by Aerosmith

All around me the world fades to silver  
Mists and shadows that just give me the shivers  
And there’s the dog  
Standing there amidst the fog  
So what should I say?  
All the shadow figures coming out to play

Here we go  
Counting out toes  
Trying just to stay composed  
Wearing thin  
Soldiers made of tin  
Slowly let your breath out and breathe in

This is all still so unfamiliar  
Though I see both Cat-Tank and pillar  
But no one’s there  
Atmosphere that makes me scared

Dream with me  
Dream far and near  
Dream of the future  
Dream like a Seer

Dream with me  
And all the spirits  
They have a message  
And we all will need to hear it

[Musical Interlude]

Dream with me  
Dream far and near  
Dream of the future  
Dream like a Seer

Dream with me  
And all the spirits  
They have a message  
And we all will need to hear it

My dream  
My dream  
My dream  
My but will this dream come true?

My dream  
My dream  
My dream  
My but will this dream come true?

My dream  
My dream  
My dream  
My dream  
My dream  
My dream  
My dream  
Ohhhhhhhhh

Dream with me  
Dream far and near  
Dream of the future  
Dream like a Seer

Dream with me  
And all the spirits  
They have a message  
And we all will need to hear it

Dream with me  
Dream far and near  
Dream of the future  
Dream like a Seer

Dream with me  
And all the spirits  
They have a message  
And we all will need to hear it


	88. "Reynir's Dream"

=99=  
Pg 435  
"Reynir's Dream"  
from [“I Dreamed a Dream”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k6YwuqWFTbc)  
(from the musical "Les Miserables")

At first I reveled in the dream  
In my safe place I cried  
"I am just so awesome!"  
But things were not as they first seemed  
As I rushed from the vale  
To stride a sea so noisome  
And Doggie barked  
And he rush'd to me

I asked if he was coming too  
And he sped off  
Alas, I followed!  
I trusted him to lead me true  
A hope that proved so sadly hollow  
The Cat-Tank loomed in front of me  
But no one came to still my knocking  
The door was sealed beneath my hands  
No way inside  
And so I wondered

Then I fin'lly looked around  
And the ghosts were all around me  
Looming darkly without sound  
Tall and silent as the grave

I swallowed back the fear I felt  
I held one hand up and said, "Oh, hi."  
The doggie calm, unruffled pelt  
False reassurance that it gave

And then the lead ghost grabbed my face  
Without a single word of comfort  
Dark talons that infringed my space  
Its blackness cold and pouring over

And as its claws sunk deeper still  
At last I felt my being shatter  
I fell apart with silent hiss  
Then Doggie said, "Remember this."


	89. The “Muppet Movie” Chapter 4 Suite

=100-104=  
Linked to Pg 441  
The “Muppet Movie” Chapter 4 Suite  
from the motion picture “The Muppet Movie”

+  
“The Team Complete”  
from [“The Magic Store”](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uiEuBcG-WXQ)

You two are so TALL!  
Yes, aren’t we, indeed!  
-Pleased to meet you. -Uh, hi?  
(I did not understand!)

(I told you so!)  
(Now I know.)  
Are you a real Captain?  
Of course and I’ve killed trolls  
A few with my bare hands  
Yep, I’m pretty great, kid  
And this is my little mage, huh?

What’s life like for you?  
Don’t want to talk now?  
-He can’t speak Scandinavian  
-Well how’s that going to work?  
-I’ll translate for him!

-I doubt that’ll work in extremis  
-You needn’t worry for him  
Without a word  
We’ve got on swimmingly!

+  
“Loading Up the Cat-Tank”  
from [“Movin’ Right Along”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6w316aA8ed8)

Loading up the Cat-Tank  
With all sorts of provender  
We’re ready to send her  
To Silent Copenhagen!

Emil has his boom-booms and  
Doc Mikkel his shot kits  
Let’s hope ev’rything fits  
And Emil’s stuff won’t blow us to bits!

Loading up the Tank  
Our feline home on wheels  
Solid bunks  
And spacious trunk  
And walls made of steel

Loading up the Tank  
With ev’rything we’ll need  
Old World maps  
To which perhaps  
Our scout will take heed

Loading up the Cat-Tank  
Though now we’re missing a mirror  
Things couldn’t be clearer  
In spite of foggy weather!

Checking off the lists of stuff  
The Quartet got for us  
Though it may bore us  
We’d wish we had if it were missing!

Loading up the Tank  
Getting all fitted out  
Don’t annoy  
The Adm’ral  
Oh, boy, how he can shout

Loading up the Tank  
Put ev’rything in place  
Uh-oh  
Emil’s found out  
There’s a bruise on his face

[Musical Interlude]

Loading up the Cat-Tank  
Now it’s time for a test drive  
But Sigrun canNOT drive  
So that’s a job for Tuuri

Quick good-byes through teary eyes  
We’re taking her out now!  
Just don’t bring the bridge down!  
No really, please, don’t break the bridge now

Boys are leaning out  
Emil has this to say:  
“I expect a party  
“When we come back this way.”

Siv is so depressed  
“This bad idea will fail.”  
Torbjörn tries  
To reassure her  
So she won’t wail

Loading up the Tank  
Loading up the Tank  
Loading up the Tank  
Loading up the Tank

+  
“How Sigrun Joined the Team”  
from [“Can You Picture That?”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XoKFBjd5-F8)

There we were in Dalsnes  
Chowing in the Old Mess  
Eating ev’ry kind of fish

At the Captains’ Table  
Only for the able  
Do they serve the Most Best dish

Gen’rals with their meetings  
Trond they were a-feting  
Yes he was the honored guest

Told them what he needed  
They of course acceded  
Found I was Most Best  
(Found she was Most Best)

Done with Summer Hunting  
Wrapping up in bunting  
All the grosslings hibernate

Grueling was the season  
Just another reason  
Made our little trip so great

Little bit of fighting  
Jabbing but no biting  
You can figure out the rest

Now all the Mess could see it  
Who else could it be but  
The one Uncle Trond found Most Best

It was apparent to my parents too  
Cause my Most Bestness will   
Always shine through  
Bring on the trolls  
The beasts  
The giants  
Bring them

Beating down the grosslings  
As it is with most things  
Found I was Most Best  
(Found she was Most Best)

+  
“Lalli in the Dreamworld”  
from [“I’m Going to Go Back There Someday”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ryEjm3k6uY0)

Wake in my haven  
Beautiful haven  
Get up and go out  
For Onni I must shout  
Cousin of mine  
At home far far away  
For Tuuri’s sake trying to say

Eternal night sea  
Outside to greet me  
Sieulintu behind  
And Onni on my mind  
Please hear my calling  
And come right away  
For Tuuri’s sake trying to say

Monsters attacking  
But no danger there  
My luonto will triumph  
With style and with flair  
But someone was running  
Across the dark sea  
When I called out to him  
He fled away from me

Time to go back now  
I still don’t quite see how  
The other vanished  
Or am I just famished?  
Back to my haven  
Flat failure today  
For Tuuri’s sake trying to say  
For Tuuri’s sake trying to say

+  
“Into the Silent World”  
from [“The Rainbow Connection”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jSFLZ-MzIhM)

Into the Silent World  
From Oresundbro  
Across this old bridge so wide  
When we went past it  
It toppled behind us  
But we made it to the far side

Then through the tunnel  
Our efforts were funneled  
Until we hit the last gate  
Into the Silence  
Our party goes onward  
And honestly I cannot wait!

Into the Silent World  
And off on adventures  
Just like I have always dreamed  
So I asked Sigrun, “Can   
“We drive a bit closer?  
“We still have ev’ning’s gleam!”

After a moment  
While she thought it over  
And while Mikkel quietly freaked  
Sigrun declined me  
“But don’t worry, Tuuri,  
We’ll be here for more than a week.”

So we sent  
Lalli to scout  
For morning would  
Bring our first  
Book run

Into the Silent World  
Went my cousin Lalli  
Running but all by himself  
Sans map and into  
A weird foreign country  
And I thought it wouldn’t end well

Emil gave voice to my  
Doubts on its wisdom  
But Sigrun said, “That’s a scout’s way!  
“Even if you try  
“To help in their scouting  
“They just end up running away!”


	90. “Onni’s Lament”

=105=  
Pg 453  
“Onni’s Lament”  
from [“…Baby One More Time”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-5m1enOt0OQ)  
by Britney Spears

Oh, Tuuri, Tuuri

Oh, Tuuri, Tuuri

Oh, Tuuri, Tuuri  
What was it that made you go  
With Lalli into danger?  
Oh, Tuuri, Tuuri  
It forced me to soon follow  
And now I’m amidst strangers

Tuuri  
You mean the world to me  
You and Lalli  
I can’t let you go alone  
Because

My loneliness is killing me  
I’m so afraid but don’t you see  
I just can’t let you leave me behind  
Dear sister mine  
I’ll leave home for you this time

Oh, Tuuri, Tuuri  
I couldn’t just leave Keuruu  
Plunging into Silence  
Oh, Tuuri, Tuuri  
Just look what you pushed me to do  
You’ve tipped me off of the fence

Tuuri  
You mean the world to me  
You and Lalli  
I can’t let you go alone  
Because

My loneliness is killing me  
I’m so afraid but don’t you see  
I just can’t let you leave me behind  
Dear sister mine  
I’ll leave home for you this time

Oh, Tuuri, Tuuri

Oh, Tuuri, Tuuri

Oh, Tuuri, Tuuri  
What was it that made you go

Oh, Tuuri, Tuuri  
It forced me to soon follow

It’s your success  
That my loneliness  
Is killing me now  
Though it’s true  
I’m so afraid  
Because you left me  
Oh dear sister mine  
I’ll leave home for you this time

My loneliness is killing me  
I’m so afraid but don’t you see  
I just can’t let you leave me behind  
Dear sister mine  
I’ll leave home for you this time

It’s your success  
(My loneliness)  
That my loneliness  
(Is killing me)  
Is killing me now  
(I’m so afraid)  
Though it’s true  
(But don’t you see)  
I’m so afraid  
(I just can’t let you)  
Because you left me  
(Leave me behind)  
Oh dear sister mine  
I’ll leave home for you this time


	91. “Water Troll”

=106=  
Pg 503  
“Water Troll”  
from [ “Edelweiss”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zuQkZD3F2EQ)  
by R. Rogers & O. Hammerstein

Water Troll  
Water Troll  
You were trying to kill me  
Now you’re stuck  
Out of luck  
Leaving you doesn’t thrill me

Murderous troll  
Now you’re in a hole  
Let your soul  
Be free now  
Water Troll  
Water Troll  
Rest is coming to thee now

Water Troll  
(Water Troll)  
Water Troll  
(Water Troll)  
You were trying to kill me  
Now you’re stuck  
(Now you’re stuck)  
Out of luck  
(Out of luck)  
Leaving you doesn’t thrill me

Murderous troll  
Now you’re in a hole  
Let your soul  
Be free now  
Water Troll  
Water Troll  
Rest is coming to thee now


	92. “Cruel Murder-Ghosts”

=107=  
Pg 505  
“Cruel Murder-Ghosts”  
from [ “Grim Grinning Ghosts” ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uAclXtYTjBk)  
by Buddy Baker

With poor Floffy beached  
And the Cat-Tank gone  
Murder-Ghosts  
Just keep pressing on  
Floffy lets out mournful sigh  
But when they have all gone by  
Cruel Murder-Ghosts  
Have sucked poor Floffy dry!

Just like poor Leaftroll  
Got a nasty shock  
They put Floffy up  
On the chopping block  
As he waited high and dry  
Knowing he was doomed to die  
Cruel Murder-Ghosts  
Have sucked poor Floffy dry!

Now if you’re in search  
Of a melody  
Floffy’s dirge  
Comes to mind you see  
No escape for that poor guy  
As the moon was climbing high  
Cruel Murder-Ghosts  
Have sucked poor Floffy dry!

On this moonlit night  
When the crew took flight  
Murder-Ghosts  
Exert their might  
As the moon rose in the sky  
Soon poor Floffy did espy  
MWA-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH

And in the wake of this depravity  
Still the Murder-Ghosts stalk relentlessly  
Seeking where the Cat-Tank be  
There to have a feasting spree  
In Floffy’s form  
Moving through the dead city


	93. “Soulless Flat Plain”

=108=  
Pg 533  
“Soulless Flat Plain”  
from [ “Upside-down World”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4aYJTcS4d_c)  
by Van Dyke Parks

Come drive with me  
Through a soulless flat plain  
Like riding a ship on the sea

Just driving along  
Without seeming to move  
Don’t let its flatness  
Knock you off your groove

On the soulless flat plain  
On the soulless flat plain

Hey  
Come drive with me  
Through this soulless flat plain  
‘Cause Denmark is Silent, you see?

We’ll see all the grosslings  
A couple days off  
It’s almost as good  
As if we were aloft

On this soulless flat plain  
On this soulless flat plain

The horizon stretches flat  
A-all around  
Oh, where are the mountains  
And where are the towns?

All around  
All is flat  
On the soulless flat plain

As we roll along  
Roaming on  
Creeping through  
Sleeping through  
Drive through the soulless flat plain!


	94. “(Murder-) Ghosts on the Prowl”

=109=  
Pg 536  
“(Murder-) Ghosts on the Prowl”  
from [ “(Ghost) Riders in the Sky” ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b27AFgLp5v0)  
by The Sons of the Pioneers/Stan Jones

A small Cat-Tank went rattlin’ cross  
The ancient bridge to Fyn  
Its little treads a-whirrin’ as  
Forever they did spin  
But all unknown and in their wake  
Some Murder-Ghosts did crawl  
All gathered in a mighty band  
With foul intentions all

Away  
Away they go-o  
Ghost host on the prowl

One had the form of poor Sjødraug  
They killed along the way  
Relentless chasers through the night  
But they rested in the day  
These Murder-Ghosts once human would  
Keep on eternally  
For the Cat-Tank held six mortal souls  
Each as tempting as could be

Away  
Away they go-o  
Murder-Ghosts on the prowl

They’ve come across a filthy barn  
And found an old horse-Beast  
Another soul to slaughter so  
Their grim host can increase  
As they slowly follow after  
Our intrepid band of six  
The Murder-Ghorsts a-hunting  
Just like addicts for a fix

Away  
Away they go-o  
Murder-Ghosts on the prowl

So the Murder-Ghosts are coming  
A-hunting for Our Crew  
Lalli got some spells from Onni and  
Let’s hope that they will do  
Cause Murder-Ghosts are coming and  
They will not be denied  
On the hunt for mortal souls  
Across the land they glide

Away  
Away they go-o  
Murder-Ghosts on the prowl  
Murder-Ghosts on the prowl  
(Away they go-o)


	95. “Ghosts in Their Hosts”

=110=  
Pg 611  
“Ghosts in Their Hosts”  
from [“Fun in the Sun [Red Dwarf Signature Tune]”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SCOmc9jVJGQ)

There's trolls outside  
And all kinds of spooks in here  
I'm not alone  
In the least  
Let me run  
Or I'll fire my gun  
Ghosts, ghosts, ghosts  
In their  
Hosts, hosts, hosts

I want to nap  
Right below Tuuri's bunk  
I want to run  
Through the night  
But I'm here  
All too truly near  
Ghosts, ghosts, ghosts  
In their  
Hosts, hosts, hosts


	96. “Odense Daze”

=111=  
Pg 611  
“Odense Daze”  
from [“The Twelve Days of Christmas”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zAYgsnRSfio)

On their first day in Odense,  
They knew they’d have to thank  
A derp-kitty in the CatTank

On their second day in Odense,  
They knew they’d have to thank  
Two non-immunes  
And a derp-kitty in the CatTank

On their third day in Odense,  
They knew they’d have to thank  
Three close calls  
Two non-immunes  
And a derp-kitty in the CatTank

On their fourth day in Odense,  
They knew they’d have to thank  
Four murder-ghosts  
Three close calls  
Two non-immunes  
And a derp-kitty in the CatTank

On their fifth day in Odense,  
They knew they’d have to thank  
Five trolls on fire  
Four murder-ghosts  
Three close calls  
Two non-immunes  
And a derp-kitty in the CatTank

On their sixth day in Odense,  
They knew they’d have to thank  
Six goofy crewmates  
Five trolls on fire  
Four murder-ghosts  
Three close calls  
Two non-immunes  
And a derp-kitty in the CatTank

On their seventh day in Odense,  
They knew they’d have to thank  
Seven books on golfing  
Six goofy crewmates  
Five trolls on fire  
Four murder-ghosts  
Three close calls  
Two non-immunes  
And a derp-kitty in the CatTank

On their eighth day in Odense,  
They knew they’d have to thank  
Eight back in Mora  
Seven books on golfing  
Six goofy crewmates  
Five trolls on fire  
Four murder-ghosts  
Three close calls  
Two non-immunes  
And a derp-kitty in the CatTank

On their ninth day in Odense,  
They knew they’d have to thank  
Nine loose-leaf binders  
Eight back in Mora  
Seven books on golfing  
Six goofy crewmates  
Five trolls on fire  
Four murder-ghosts  
Three close calls  
Two non-immunes  
And a derp-kitty in the CatTank

On their tenth day in Odense,  
They knew they’d have to thank  
Ten runos chanted  
Nine loose-leaf binders  
Eight back in Mora  
Seven books on golfing  
Six goofy crewmates  
Five trolls on fire  
Four murder-ghosts  
Three close calls  
Two non-immunes  
And a derp-kitty in the CatTank

On their eleventh day in Odense,  
They knew they’d have to thank  
Eleven bowls of hot sludge  
Ten runos chanted  
Nine loose-leaf binders  
Eight back in Mora  
Seven books on golfing  
Six goofy crewmates  
Five trolls on fire  
Four murder-ghosts  
Three close calls  
Two non-immunes  
And a derp-kitty in the CatTank

On their twelfth day in Odense,  
They knew they’d have to thank  
Twelve watchful grosslings  
Eleven bowls of hot sludge  
Ten runos chanted  
Nine loose-leaf binders  
Eight back in Mora  
Seven books on golfing  
Six goofy crewmates  
Five trolls on fire  
Four murder-ghosts  
Three close calls  
Two non-immunes  
And a derp-kitty in the CatTank


	97. “Sigh”

=112=  
Pg 667  
“Sigh”  
from [“Signs”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uYsBDmqJfjQ)  
by The 5 Man Electrical Band

Now the sigh from night scout Hotakainen caught her off guard  
He just picked the kitty up from the ground and just cried in her fur so hard  
She went to him after Sigrun scared her with yells meant for Emil  
But the night scout was sad  
And that made her feel bad (yup)  
So she let him spill  
Whoa-oh-oh

Sigh  
Sigh  
Kitty hears a sigh  
Coming unexpectedly  
From the scout guy  
First he cuddled her  
Then he heaved a sigh...


	98. “No Regret I Find”

=113=  
Pg 708  
“No Regret I Find”  
from [“For the Longest Time”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_XgQhMPeEQ)  
by Billy Joel

Oh  
Oh-oh-oh  
No regret I find  
Oh-oh-oh  
No regret I find

If I’d stayed at  
Home in Ke-u-ruu  
Then I never  
Would have known all you  
I couldn’t bear that  
Without this life would be flat  
And when I look back  
No regret I find

Oh  
Oh-oh-oh  
No regret I find  
Oh-oh-oh  
No regret I find

I would still make  
Each choice that I did  
I have dreamed of  
This since just a kid  
I had to do it  
Though I may not live all through it  
So when I look back  
No regret I find

Oh  
Oh-oh-oh  
No regret I find  
Oh-oh-oh  
No regret I find

Now that I’ve been  
Bitten by a troll  
You might think that  
I regret it all  
But you’d be so wrong  
My need to roam is so strong  
That when I look back  
No regret I find

I don’t think that  
My fate is sealed  
I still have hope  
I will be healed  
It could be that  
I have the Rash  
I’m not abashed  
For I’m  
Living my dream life

If infected  
I will surely die  
But until then  
I refuse to cry  
I’ll be my own girl  
Out exploring in the wide world  
And when I look back  
No regret I find

I know you re-  
Gret what you’ve done  
You fled from your home  
You weren’t a good son  
But I cannot  
Share the sad you feel  
My joy at this is real  
For I’m  
Free from my old life

And if it is  
My fate here to die  
I will meet that  
Fate all satisfied  
My dreams have come true  
So Reynir don’t be blue cause  
Every time I look back  
No regret I find

Oh  
Oh-oh-oh  
No regret I find  
Oh-oh-oh  
No regret I find  
Oh-oh-oh  
No regret I find  
Oh-oh-oh  
No regret I find...


	99. “Silent World Foray”

=114=  
Pg 727  
“Silent World Foray”  
from [“Copacabana”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vLWzl_gRPc0)  
by Liza Minnelli and the Muppets

His name was Lalli  
He was a night scout  
He bore his Grandma’s battered gun  
As all through the night he’d run  
But with the morning  
To camp he’d come back  
For decontamination there  
It was really hard to bear  
Done by the Messy Swede  
A faithful friend indeed  
And when Lalli was bathed by Emil  
All the fandom squeed!

His name was Lalli  
He was a night scout  
He bore his Grandma’s battered gun  
As all through the night he’d run  
But with the morning  
To camp he’d come back  
For decontamination there  
It was really hard to bear  
Done by the Messy Swede  
A faithful friend indeed  
And when Lalli was bathed by Emil  
All the fandom squeed!

On the Foray  
Silent World Foray  
Though really it’s just a big book raid  
On the Foray  
Silent World Foray  
Books for the stealin’  
As they roam through Zealand  
On the Foray  
Tuuri got bit

His name was Reynir  
He was a shepherd  
He stowed away aboard a crate  
And emerged to find his fate  
He was regretful  
But not so Tuuri  
She told him, “Reynir, don’t repine!  
“You can try another time!  
“So Reynir don’t despair!  
“And who said life was fair?”  
Reynir nodded to keep her happy  
And just sat there

On the Foray  
Silent World Foray  
Books for the stealin’  
As they roam through Zealand  
On the Foray  
“It was worth it”

His name was Lalli  
He was a night scout  
But now they need to go on foot  
Cause the engine went kaput  
So now they’re scrounging  
Emil and Lalli  
Though Lalli wears a dour mien  
And knocked Emil on the bean  
They’re searching through the store  
The ceiling’s on the floor  
We see the wheelbarrows for the taking  
But will they roll more?

On the Foray  
Silent World Foray  
Books for the stealin’  
As they roam through Zealand  
On the Foray  
Just wait for it…


	100. “I Was in His Mind”

=115=  
Pg 804

“I Was in His Mind”  
from [“You Were on My Mind”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=29uNvGHsRlc)  
by We Five

When I went down the hallway  
I was in his mind  
And  
I was in his mind

He was troubled  
Oh-oh-oh  
By his mem’ries  
Oh-oh-oh  
Which I saw unwind

As I peeped round the corner  
I could see so plain  
Yes  
I could see so plain

It was Emil  
Oh-oh-oh  
He was chubby  
Oh-oh-oh  
I could feel his pain

When I went down the hallway  
I was in his mind  
And  
I was in his mind

He was troubled  
Oh-oh-oh  
By his mem’ries  
Oh-oh-oh  
Which I saw unwind

So  
It was disturbing  
What I did view  
Well  
All that I did view

He was eating  
Oh-oh-oh  
He was dressed weird  
Oh-oh-oh  
He wasn’t happy, this is true

When I went down the hallway  
I was in his mind  
And  
I was in his mind

He was troubled  
Oh-oh-oh-oh  
By his mem’ries  
Oh-oh-oh-oh  
Which I saw unwind…


	101. “Velje Lullaby”

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Much sadness ahead.

=116=  
Forum Exclusive

“Velje Lullaby”  
from [“Whiskey Lullaby”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=933-o_s33qo)  
by Alison Krauss & Brad Paisley

She always thought  
There was someone up there looking out for her  
It wasn’t so  
For her there would be no miracle cure  
She heard the voices creeping in  
And Kitty was afraid  
And her shoulder bore the Rash so plain  
That Tuuri was dismayed  
And so it was

She threw her mask away and walked  
Into the inlet  
And let the waters close above her head  
Lalli felt  
His insides twist in upset  
But before he reached the beach  
Her soul had fled  
And Onni tried to catch her on the Birds’ Path  
But despite all he could do, she flew too high  
And as the Swan of Tuonela took her  
Little Tuuri sang a Velje lullaby

Yes Onni flew  
But his mighty owl’s wings were not enough  
And so he fell  
Away from that most precious bit of fluff  
But before she left, she said, “Don’t cry  
You know we’ll meet again.”  
But that didn’t help the broken hearts  
She left in her own kin  
And all because

She threw her mask away and walked  
Into the inlet  
And let the waters close above her head  
Lalli felt  
His insides twist in upset  
But before he reached the beach  
Her soul had fled  
And Onni tried to catch her on the Birds’ Path  
But despite all he could do, she flew too high  
And as the Swan of Tuonela took her  
Little Tuuri sang a Velje lullaby


End file.
